


Piss off your parents, date me to scare them.

by crumbleduppieceofpaper



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Bad Girl Carmilla, Dork Laura Hollis, Evil Stepmom, F/F, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Ginger gang is in on all this too, Hollstein - Freeform, Jealous Carmilla
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-16
Updated: 2016-07-19
Packaged: 2018-05-27 04:32:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6269797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crumbleduppieceofpaper/pseuds/crumbleduppieceofpaper
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Laura's dad's been a real raging b.. ad person lately. So what better way to piss him and Laura's new evil stepmom off than by dating the school's bad girl?</p><p>aka</p><p>I'm a slut for bad girl Carmilla, for fake relationships and for high school AUs.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“God, Dad, you don’t understand!”

“Not if you won’t talk to me!”

“I don’t talk to you because you don’t _listen_!”

“That’s not true!”

“You’re doing it right now!” Laura shouted and she rushed out of the house. Past her dad, past her stepmother’s judging look, past her stepmom’s evil little minion Alex.

She took to the driveway and contemplated taking her car, until she realized that Alex still had the keys. Her Nissan was only one of many things she had to share since her dad met Natalie.

She had really liked Natalie at first. Besides the fact that she had liked anyone who could make her dad happy – God knows he deserved to be, after mourning her mother for eight years – she actually liked his date, with her blonde hair and kind, blue eyes. Natalie had shown interest in Laura from the moment they met, asking her about school and playing pranks on Laura’s dad with her. She’d even taken her to gay pride once and when Laura went to concerts, she’d give her money for merch.

Laura had to admit that she’d never really gotten along with Alex. It wasn’t that she had disliked _him_ , it was just that he would look at her in a way she’d disliked – as if she was prey. She had always felt really uncomfortable around him, so in school, she’d just avoid him.

Things had gotten a little more complicated when Natalie and Alex moved in.

Laura made locking the shower door a habit. She no longer walked around in her pajama shorts and tank top on Sundays. She hid important things under her bed after she started losing money and comics.

She didn’t mind adjusting. She just minded not feeling safe in her own home.

So she talked to her dad about it. She came to him with her story, nearly too embarrassed to tell him about the way Alex looked at her. She didn’t know why she felt ashamed when _she_ was the victim, but she did feel that way. However, she pushed through and told her dad about the money she was missing. She came to him with the hope that he would protect her, like the past 8 years when anyone had threatened his little girl.

His reaction was a little different from what Laura had expected: he had just sighed and told her, “I’ll discuss it with Natalie.”

Laura had been taken aback by that. She’d thought, at first, that this was all her fault. She was convinced that she shouldn’t have complained about it, until she talked to Danny about it and Danny had gotten pissed at her dad. After an hour long talk with Danny, Laura realized that her dad had changed. It had happened slowly, so slowly that she hadn’t noticed before. But now she did notice and it scared her.

Her dad kept his promise. He did discuss it with Natalie. Laura thought that if her dad didn’t take her seriously, maybe Natalie would. Maybe Natalie would understand, the way she’d usually understand when Laura felt bad. But all Natalie cared about was protecting her son.

As soon as Laura’s dad had talked to Natalie, Natalie had come to Laura’s room and given Laura a speech about the good guy Alex was, that he had taken care of her the way Laura had taken care of her dad and that Laura had nothing to be afraid of. Which, of course she believed that of her own son. The thing that hurt Laura was that Natalie hadn’t said it with empathy or reassurance. She had said it matter-of-factly.

After that, she had ruffled Laura’s hair up a bit and told her that dinner would be ready in a few minutes.

(Laura hadn’t eaten a thing that night.)

 

The worst thing was that Alex hadn’t changed after the talk; Natalie had. She had become more protective of Alex and his nasty tricks and she had started to look at Laura as if she was the one stealing money. Slowly, Laura could see the hate in Natalie’s eyes increasing and she could hear from Natalie’s voice that she was starting to despise Laura.

Apparently she was the only one whom it was clear to though, because when she talked to her dad about it, he told her that she was being ridiculous and that Natalie loved her.

Yeah, Natalie had really started to affect her dad’s way of thinking.

Instead of protecting Laura, her dad had started to protect Natalie in every argument. He protected Natalie when Natalie used up all Laura’s bath salt, the salt that always helped her relax when she was stressing over school. He protected Natalie when Natalie had promised Alex Laura’s car and he told Laura that she had to learn how to share. He protected Natalie when Natalie told Laura that her outfit was too slutty. He protected Natalie when Natalie yelled at Laura for no reason.

The worst part was that Laura hadn’t only lost her dad, she had also lost her stepmother. The stepmother that she had thought, for a while, could be a worthy replacement for her actual mom.

These days, she just felt stupid when she realized that she had thought so.

 

 

 

 

So now she had run out on yet another argument with her dad. Arguing with him seemed to be a daily activity lately.

She threw her backpack over her shoulder and kept walking. She was supposed to drive herself and Alex to school, as always, but she really wouldn’t be able to deal with him right now. He always knew exactly how to get under her skin and if there was one thing she didn’t need after the argument she’d just had, it was Alex annoying her.

She kept walking until she reached Kirsch’s house, which wasn’t too far from her own. Knocking on the door with trembling hands, she tried to calm down. The door swung open.

“Hey little nerd,” Kirsch greeted her. He frowned when he saw the expression on her face.

“Argument with my dad,” she explained before he could ask. He nodded, understanding, and opened up his arms for her to step into. She let herself relax against his chest.

“So, you want a ride to school?”

“I’d like that.”

 

 

 

 

 _Great,_ Laura thought as she realized that she had history first period.

She didn’t mind history that much – most of the time, she actually liked it. It was just that they had a seating chart in that class and that her spot was right next to the most annoying girl in class. Carmilla used weird nicknames for her, would show off with her knowledge of history and was also incredibly attractive, which was _really_ distracting. But most of all, it seemed to be her life goal to irritate Laura all class long.

“Morning cupcake,” Carmilla said when she came walking into class five minutes late, dressed in leather and smelling like smoke. Laura would bet her Doctor Who collection that she had been smoking and making out with a random girl from the swim team before she’d gotten to class.

“Not today, Carmilla,” Laura mumbled.

“Well well well, what’s gotten under your skin? For future reference, of course,” Carmilla smirked.

“You want me to tell you what annoys me so you can use it to annoy me in the future? No way.”

“Let me guess. Did the giant ginger forget to send you a good morning text?”

Laura should’ve known this was going to come. Carmilla had made mean comments about Danny from that one day Danny had walked her to class a year ago.

“For the last time, Danny and I are not dating and no, it’s a little more complicated than that.”

“Come on buttercup, humor me with your issues,” Carmilla pressed on.

Laura sighed. She could _not_ deal with Carmilla bothering her all class. Not today.

“I just had an argument with my dad about my evil stepmom, no biggie.”

She looked over at Carmilla, surprised when it stayed silent. Laura had expected a sarcastic comment about Laura’s happy family life, but instead she saw Carmilla staring down at her table, frowning. When she looked up at Laura, it wasn’t with a raised eyebrow or her seduction eyes. She looked serious.

“Stepparents suck.”

“Yeah,” Laura replied, a little taken aback by Carmilla’s genuine response. Carmilla noticed.

“What, you thought sarcasm was my only way of communication?”

“A little, yeah,” Laura chuckled.

“Well, you’re not the only one with parents from hell.”

“Really?” Laura asked, surprised at the fact that Carmilla had a stepparent she hated as well, but even more surprised that Carmilla was sharing it with her.

“Yeah. You know what usually helped me?”

“What?” Laura asked, wondering if Carmilla was gonna give her some real advice or blow her off after all.

“Annoy them right back.”

“How?”

“I have my ways. You should find yours,” Carmilla smirked at her.

 

 

 

 

Laura thought about Carmilla’s advice all day.

One half of her didn’t want to make the whole situation with her dad worse. However, the other half of her knew that arguing was already in their daily routine. She doubted pissing him off more could make that much worse.

But more than not wanting to make it worse, she wanted to upset her dad. She couldn’t believe the dad he was being. Did the fact that he was being such a bad dad not give her the right to be a bad daughter? Did she not have the right to at least do something back?

 

She didn’t eat much at lunch, still thinking about what Carmilla had said.

“What’s bothering you, Hollis?” Danny asked over her French fries. Lafontaine and Perry looked up at that, listening in on the conversation.

“It’s just – I had a fight with my dad today and Carmilla said this thing…” Laura trailed off. Danny groaned.

“If Carmilla said it, it can’t be any good.”

“No, she was actually trying to help this time,” Laura defended Carmilla. The fact that Carmilla had tried to help made her feel guilty for all the times she had ranted to her friends about her classmate.

“What’d she say?” LaFontaine asked curiously. Laura explained the situation and told them about Carmilla’s advice.

“I don’t see how hurting your dad and making the whole situation worse will help,” Perry said.

“Could’ve told you this five minutes ago, but yeah, I agree – Carmilla obviously just wants to watch things with your dad blow up so she can go home, crawl into the coffin in her dark cellar and laugh sadistically,” Danny reasoned.

Laura shook her head, frowning, “No, that can’t be it. She actually looked a little touched today.”

“Okay, Laura, I know you and when you set your mind on something our opinions won’t stop you. So how are you gonna assure that she doesn’t get to watch you burn like Danny said?” LaFontaine chimed in.

Laura thought about it for a while.

“Well, I guess as an insurance policy I’ll have to make sure that if I burn, she burns with me,” she said, grinning.

“This does _not_ sound like a good plan,” LaFontaine warned. Laura just smiled at them, got up and walked away.

She had found her ways, like Carmilla had told her to, and those ways included Carmilla.

 

 

 

 

“Carmilla!” Laura walked – more like powerwalked – over to the lockers against which Carmilla was leaning effortlessly while flirting with some girl. Laura could recognize the seduction eyes from a kilometer’s distance.

“Oh lord, it looks like cutie’s on a mission,” Carmilla commented to the blonde next to her. The blonde snickered. Laura rolled her eyes at the mockery. It wasn’t like she wasn’t used to it.

“Can we talk? Like, in private?” Laura asked. Carmilla raised an eyebrow, a smirk still on her face. Laura closed her eyes for a second, knowing that whatever was to come, it wouldn’t be good.

“If you want eyeliner tips, I can give you them in front of Elsie.”

“Carmilla, I’m serious,” Laura scoffed. The smirk disappeared from Carmilla’s face. She pushed herself away from the lockers, slinging the backpack that was standing by her feet over her shoulder. Laura looked at the backpack and couldn’t say she was surprised that it was made of fake, black leather.

“I’ll see you later,” Carmilla said to Elsie, shooting her a quick wink.

(Laura tried not to throw up.)

 

 

 

 

“I need to ask you something,” Laura started as soon as Carmilla had followed her to a somewhat private corner of the school hallway. She checked to see if Carmilla was still listening – which she was, but with a bored scowl on her face, like often when Laura was talking.

“I need you to seriously consider this, ‘cause it’s important to me.”

“Yeah, yeah, creampuff, I’ll take it seriously, just tell me what it is,” Carmilla waved her worries away. She acted as if it wasn’t a big deal but Laura could see that her eyes were opened just slightly wider, her right hand holding onto the straps of her backpack. Carmilla was listening.

“Will you be my girlfriend?” Laura asked, fiddling with her fingers nervously. Carmilla raised an eyebrow.

“Well, I’m flattered you ask, but –”

“It’s not like that, God. Listen, you told me to find a way to annoy my dad. I think I’ve found one. He’s always been really sensitive about who I date and all, so – ”

“So you thought you’d ask your classmate who smokes and wears leather to be your fake girlfriend? To piss him off?” Carmilla finished. She looked unimpressed. But didn’t she always?

“… You make it sound really negative, but yes,” Laura affirmed. She bit her lip. She’d be really screwed if Carmilla said no. Not only would she have to make a whole different plan, Carmilla would undoubtedly also tell the whole school that Laura Hollis had asked her to be her girlfriend. This whole plan meant social suicide. But LaFontaine was right – as soon as Laura had planned something, she was going to do it. So she had to at least try this plan, even if rejection would mean being an outcast for a month or two, which, to be honest, she kind of already was.

Carmilla didn’t laugh in Laura’s face, though. She stayed silent.

This only made Laura more insecure. She shouldn’t have asked Carmilla this. Not only was she unsure she could trust Carmilla fully, she also put her burdens on Carmilla’s back. Carmilla had told her that she had problems with her own family – how could Laura put the weight of _her_ family issues on Carmilla’s shoulders right next to the weight of Carmilla’s own problems?

“I understand if you don’t want to or need to think about it – ”

“I’ll do it,” Carmilla cut her off again.

“Wait, what?” Laura asked, not really being able to believe that Carmilla actually just agreed to help her.

Carmilla shrugged, “I’ve gotten fairly good at pissing off parents. Might as well see how annoyed yours can get.”

“Wow, okay,” Laura started, trying to gather her thoughts, but the ringing of the bell cut her off.

“Okay, I have to go to class now, but we need to talk about this. Give me your number,” Laura said, shoving her phone into Carmilla’s hands. Carmilla smirked.

“Wow, cupcake, dominant. I’ve got a feeling that in this relationship, I’ll finally be the bottom.” She winked at Laura and Laura cringed.

“There ya go, sweetheart,” Carmilla said, giving Laura the phone back. Laura nodded.

“Thanks. I’ll text you,” she said before she disappeared in the school hallways.

 

(Laura took one last glance over her shoulder to see Carmilla looking at her with a smirk on her face.)


	2. Chapter 2

The first thing Laura had to cross off her list was telling her friends.

“She’s your _what_?” Danny raged. Laura sighed. She knew this was coming. Not only did Danny have an enormous hate for Carmilla, she’d also always been protective of Laura when it came to crushes or dating. It was kind of like having an older sister.

“Fake girlfriend. I know it sounds weird, but I kinda trust her and this is the only way to assure that the plan is gonna work _and_ to involve her in it.”

“And why exactly did you need the plan to work again?” Danny asked.

“I’ve told you this –”

“Yeah, you need to piss off your dad,” Danny rolled her eyes, “God, Laura, it’s like you’re twelve instead of seventeen.”

That comment actually hurt a little bit and Danny’s annoyed expression didn’t make it any better. Laura sighed, looking down at her hands.

“Hey, you might wanna take it easy with the whole teenage stupidity thing. I mean, I think it’s kinda brave that Laura’s trying this,” LaFontaine defended.

“Thank you!” Laura said, relieved that at least one of her friends had her back.

“I’ll support you whatever you do, little L,” Kirsch added.

“Why is he here again?” Danny asked, rubbing her forehead. Carmilla wasn’t the only person Danny didn’t get along with.

“Well, Laura, it certainly is… interesting. Please just be careful,” Perry said, choosing her words cautiously after she’d seen Laura’s disappointment at Danny’s reaction.

“Don’t worry, it’s not like she’s gonna eat me or anything,” Laura said, rolling her eyes at her friends’ worries.

“She might want to, though,” LaFontaine snorted.

“LaFontaine,” Perry called out, shocked.

LaFontaine just smirked.

 

 

 

 

**Laura (9:41): hey can i call you?**

**Carmilla (9:43): Sure, cupcake.**

 

“So, we need to make a plan,” Laura said as soon as Carmilla answered her phone.

“Hello to you too,” Carmilla mumbled.

“Are you sure you wanna do this? Because I totally understand if you don’t and you should tell me if that’s the case.”

“Yes, buttercup, I am sure. Are you?”

Laura thought about it for a moment.

Her relationship with her dad had never been this bad. To be fair, she had always stood for not giving up on someone when they gave up on you. She’d always said that if you really loved someone, you wouldn’t let them push you away. You wouldn’t give up if they turned their back on you. But she had tried to fix this relationship with her dad multiple times – going to the beach with him, asking him to take her to the movies, offering to play board games on a Friday night when really, she’d rather have gone out with her friends. She had tried to fix it, but Natalie always came along to wherever they were going and Natalie had always gotten her dad’s attention. And when she had tried to talk to her dad about it, Natalie had always gotten the benefit of the doubt.

So yeah, her dad had screwed up majorly. But revenge had never really been Laura’s thing. She had never believed in doing something to another just because they had done the same to you. That just wasn’t right.

Laura started to doubt what she was doing until she let her eyes wander through the room and noticed that the door was locked. She must’ve locked it subconsciously for fear Alex might come in when she was undressing. The realization was enough for her to make a decision.

“I’m sure.”

“Good. So what did you wanna talk about?”

“Well, first of all, we need to set some boundaries. Of course we have to make it credible, but we also need to know how far we wanna go,” Laura said, not naming what exactly she was thinking about.

“You mean you wanna know if you can kiss me?” Carmilla asked. Laura could just _hear_ her smirk through the phone.

“Basically, yes,” she said, too embarrassed to come up with an equally smug response.

“I’m open for whatever. I guess it’s all up to you, cutie.”

“Oh, okay. I guess it all depends on the situation. We’ll see what happens, right?” Laura asked, not totally sure if just seeing what happens was practically the best option, but also not wanting to discuss it with Carmilla right now. It had been a long day, with her dad looking her as if she was a hopeless case and Danny shouting at her.

“Sure,” Carmilla simply said.

“Okay.”

“Oh, cupcake – I hope you do know that I’m not the holding hands kinda type.”

Laura snorted. Carmilla had said it as if she was already having nightmares of Laura’s sweaty hand in hers.

“I kinda figured that out myself. Don’t worry. I don’t think we need to be holding hands for this to be believable.”

“Good. I was afraid I’d disappoint you immensely if I refused to hold your hand tomorrow.”

“However cute it is that you’re considerate of my feelings, don’t lose any sleep over it. This relationship is strictly professional and if our relationship is credible without me holding your hand, I’d be happy to go without.”

“Good! Now, talking about sleep, I’m gonna go to bed ‘cause I’m gonna need enough sleep if I wanna survive all your babbling tomorrow.”

“Oh, how sweet,” Laura mocked back, “I bet you stay up reading those pretentious philosophy books ‘till midnight.”

“Better than your Snape/Ron fanfiction,” Carmilla said right before she hung up.

( _Dammit,_ Laura thought, _so she did see what I was reading in class the other day._ )

 

 

 

 

“Do we _really_ have to do this?” Carmilla groaned. Laura rolled her eyes and kept dragging her to the cafeteria. Carmilla could be so whiny sometimes.

“Yes, Carm, as I told you, my stepbrother goes to this school. He needs to see us hanging out,” she explained once again. Carmilla sighed.

“And I don’t mind hanging out with you, but do I really have to sit with the ginger gang as well?”

“Aw, you don’t mind hanging out with me? That’s the sweetest thing you’ve said to me so far,” Laura grinned. Carmilla just rolled her eyes, releasing Laura’s grab on her wrist and fiddling with the straps of her backpack instead. Without Laura pulling her along, she slowed her pace, but at least she was following Laura.

“You totally missed the point of what I just said.”

“I’m sure the ‘ginger squad’ isn’t all too excited to hang out with you either, but what needs to be done, needs to be done.”

 

 

 

 

“What is _she_ doing here?” Danny said as soon as she arrived at their usual table in the cafeteria. She didn’t even try to make it subtle; just looked at Carmilla as if they were archenemies and put her tray down with a smash. She took the seat opposite Laura, looking at her for an explanation.

“Believe me, I’m asking myself the same ding,” Carmilla commented sarcastically. At least that was one thing they had in common.

“Why don’t you go back to the bleachers and smoke your stuff, leave Laura alone?” 

“Aw, you jealous, beanstalk?” Carmilla smirked, throwing her arm around Laura. Laura stiffened. Carmilla noticed and slowly put her arm back on the tray in front of her, acting as if she didn’t just totally get rejected by the girl next to her. 

Danny looked triumphant, but before she could say anything about it, they were interrupted by LaFontaine and Perry arriving at their table.

LaFontaine was carrying a tray full of fried chicken, two chocolate chips cookies and mashed potatoes, while Perry seemed to have taken both their peas and fruit cups.

“You must be Carmilla,” Perry said when she noticed the girl next to Laura, sticking out her hand for Carmilla to shake. Carmilla didn’t look up from her food and just nodded at Perry, not bothering to shake Perry’s hand. Perry awkwardly retracted her hand and took a seat next to Danny.

“Hi,” LaFontaine said, sliding into the seat next to Perry’s, “I use they/them pronouns. Just so you know.”

“Laura told me,” Carmilla said, nodding her acknowledgement. She didn’t say much else about it, but Laura saw from the way she nodded that she had it noted in her mind.

“So tell us about you, Carmilla,” Perry began. Danny snorted. It was obvious that Perry hadn’t met Carmilla before.

“I’d really rather not,” Carmilla commented. Perry looked a little taken aback by that, quirking up one eyebrow, but didn’t push further.

“Carmilla’s kinda private,” Laura excused her, already feeling a little embarrassed at the way Carmilla was interacting with her friends.

“I’m right here, cupcake,” Carmilla said in a sweet but clearly irritated voice.

LaFontaine quickly changed the topic to what they’d done in biology today.

 

 

 

 

 

“Walk me to class?” Laura asked as soon as the bell signaled the end of lunch. Carmilla looked up from the book she had started reading when LaFontaine was talking about biology. She attached what looked like a black paperclip to a page and closed the book.

“Is that necessary?” she asked in her usual uninterested voice.

“Well, yeah, Alex is in this class and –”

“I’ll walk you,” Danny offered. Both Carmilla and Laura looked up, although Carmilla did so with a more vigilant expression than Laura.

“I mean, I know how he freaks you out. I don’t mind walking you,” Danny said with a smile.

“That’s really –” Laura started, but she was interrupted by Carmilla.

“Don’t worry jolly ginger, I’ve got this.” Carmilla got up, put her book in her backpack and slung the backpack over her shoulder. She looked at Laura.

“You ready?” she said, winking at her before turning around and pushing her way through the crowd to get to the main hall. Laura knew it was just to piss Danny off, but she couldn’t help blushing, which then, of course, pissed Danny off even more.

Laura got up quickly, turned to Danny, mouthed a ‘maybe next time’ and followed Carmilla.

 

 

 

 

Carmilla looked over her shoulder to check that Laura was following and grinned to herself when she saw the smaller girl hurrying to catch up with her. She had to admit that Laura did look kinda cute with the backpack that almost covered her whole back.

“Hurry up kiddy, I wanna have a smoke before I go to my class.”

“Hey, being an inch longer than me does not give you the right to call me kiddy,” Laura said as soon as she’d caught up with Carmilla.

“Whatever, just keep walking.”

“Do you even know where we’re going?”

“I’m assuming English, since you haven’t stopped talking about the presentation on feminism you’re supposed to give today.”

“Wow, I didn’t think you were listening!” Laura exclaimed, surprised. Maybe Carmilla wasn’t as indifferent as she’d thought, after all.

Carmilla didn’t reply, probably not wanting to admit that she actually cared a teeny tiny bit. She just started walking a little faster so Laura fell behind. Laura grinned, victorious.

“So, that didn’t go as bad as I thought it might,” Laura broke the silence between them. Carmilla didn’t look back at her when she said that, just kept making her way through all the other students in the busy hall.

“Despite the giant glaring at me?” she commented.

Laura caught up with Carmilla’s fast walking and said, “Well you didn’t exactly give her your sweetest smile.”

Carmilla had been glaring right back at Danny, making sarcastic comments about everything Danny had said, even when she’d pretended to be focused on her book.

“I don’t do sweet smiles,” Carmilla said, keeping her face neutral to prove her point.

“Is that a challenge?” Laura teased. The corners of Carmilla’s lips turned up, but she didn’t exactly smile. Laura took it as even more as a challenge.

“I’m warning you, one day I’ll make you smile so much your cheeks are aching.”

“Sure cupcake, now throw your arm around me, we’re nearly there,” Carmilla commanded. Laura did as she was told, but throwing her arm around Carmilla’s shoulders was a little awkward since she was smaller.

Carmilla sighed and shook off Laura’s arm, throwing her own arm around Laura’s shoulders instead.

(This time, Laura didn’t stiffen. She relaxed into the embrace, telling herself this was only because she was trying to make it look as natural as possible.)

 

 

 

 

After Carmilla pushing practically everyone out of their way and a whole lot of swearing, they arrived at the classroom. Laura took a quick peek inside and sighed.

“He’s not here yet,” she reported to Carmilla. Carmilla groaned, removing her arm from around Laura’s shoulders. Laura slumped back against the wall.

“So all this was for nothing?”

“Not if you wait here with me ‘till he comes,” Laura said, smiling sweetly because she knew that Carmilla wasn’t gonna have the time to smoke if she waited with Laura. Carmilla sighed, knowing exactly what Laura was doing.

“God, Hollis, I’m starting to wonder why I’m part of this.”

“Shhh, there he is,” Laura shushed her. Carmilla, who had her back turned towards the hallways and thus towards Alex, raised one eyebrow at her. Laura saw Camilla listening intently, her eyes trained to the ground to focus on what she was hearing, until her eyes snapped up and she looked at Laura. She leant in a little and placed her hand next to Laura’s head so that she was cornering Laura.

“Giggle,” she whispered. Laura did as she said, giggling in the way she usually did. Okay, so maybe she overdid it a little – she noticed from the way Carmilla raised her eyebrows at her and gritted her teeth, probably thinking to herself about how worthless an actress Laura was.

“So I’ll see you later,” Carmilla said loud enough for anyone in the hallway to hear. Laura looked into Carmilla’s eyes – wow, who’d have known they were this perfect shade of brown? – but she saw Alex passing them from the corner of her eye.

“Sure, I’ll text you,” she said, leaning in to press a kiss on Carmilla’s cheek. The corners of Carmilla’s mouth turned up in a fake smile that disappeared as soon as Alex had walked into the classroom. Laura took a quick glance into the classroom and saw Alex watching her. Carmilla must’ve noticed too ‘cause she smirked and shot Laura a wink before she turned around to walk to her own class.

Laura watched as Carmilla walked away, making a show out of checking out Carmilla’s ass – which, to be fair, looked pretty good – before she walked into the classroom.

She was passing Alex on her way to her seat when he grabbed her wrist, pulled her close and whispered, “Wait ‘till Mark hears about this.”

She shuddered, broke away from his grip and sunk into a chair at the back of the classroom. Something in her was laughing internally at what Alex had just said. Little did that idiot know that telling her dad was exactly what she wanted him to do. She was just getting her books out of her bag when her phone vibrated in her jean pocket.  
  
**  
Carmilla (12:17): That was gross. But I’m pretty sure it worked.**

  
Laura smiled, put her phone back in her pocket and thought of what their next move should be.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've been really overwhelmed by the response to this fic. every single e-mail about a comment or new kudos made me smile. thank you guys so much for making my days.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this took so long to upload and thank you for all the kind comments. enjoy x

“So, Laura, is there anything you wanna tell us?” Laura’s dad asked during dinner on Wednesday evening. Laura looked up from the lasagna she’d been tossing around with her fork for the last twenty minutes. She hated lasagna, but Natalie was crazy about it, so it was all they really ate these days.

“Not really,” Laura said, a little unsure because she was used to being silent during dinner. Just eat, be polite, try to be quiet, she told herself nowadays.

“Really? Nothing about a girl?” Natalie asked. Laura’s head shot up, suddenly remembering what had happened in English class the day before. Right before her presentation on feminism – which had gone really well, thank God, because although enthusiastic, she was always a little awkward when in front of a class – Alex had grabbed her wrist and told her he’d tell Mark about Carmilla. She couldn’t help the blush that crept onto her cheeks.

“Well, I guess a little birdy told you… I’m dating someone. Her name is Carmilla and she goes to school with us.”

Mark nodded, acting as if Alex hadn’t probably told him over their chess game last night already. He smiled at Laura, one of his dad-smiles that Laura hadn’t seen in quite a while and grabbed her hand. Turning her hand around, he stroked his thumb over the back of it softly.

“I’m really happy for you, Laura. Maybe we can meet her soon?”

Laura was a little taken aback by her dad’s sincere reaction, expecting him to be more authoritative than supporting.

“Uh, yeah, sure.”

“How about Friday? She could come for dinner and board games, like when you were younger.”

Laura smiled at her dad and tried not to let the guilt show on her face. She’d set up a plan to piss him off and his first reaction was to support her, to be supportive of who she was dating. He was even trying to make her feel comfortable with her girlfriend meeting her family. They hadn’t done a dinner and board games night in forever, he was obviously trying to arrange it to make her feel good. Maybe he felt guilty for not noticing she liked someone, even though she didn’t.

The poor man was trying to make her feel good while she was trying to make him feel bad. Words couldn’t describe how guilty she felt.

That was, until Natalie looked up and said, “We’re going to the opera on Friday.”

Until her dad scratched the back of his head, said, “Oh right, of course. Maybe some other time.”

 

 

 

 

“Carm, why are you here? We’ve got work to do!” Laura said, rushing into Carmilla’s spot at the back of the library. Carmilla was sitting with her back against the walls, knees bent over each other. She groaned.

“How did you find me?”

“I have my methods,” Laura said, not wanting to admit she had gone to Elsie, Carmilla’s study buddy slash hook-up, to ask where she was going when she wasn’t smoking behind the bleachers. After Elsie told her about the library, it wasn’t hard to figure out that Carmilla would be in the furthest corner, as far away from everything as possible.

And as much as Laura respected privacy, she and Carmilla had a lot of preparing to do.

“Well, you found me now. What do you want?”

“To invite you for dinner. Next Saturday,” Laura said. Natalie had convinced her to invite Carmilla to come on Saturday, probably already excited to meet Carmilla so she could gossip about it to her weekly reading club. One in which no actual reading gets done. 

“Wow, so your dad knows already? Guess that little dickhead of a stepbrother ratted us out, then?”

“Yes, but we don’t have time for small talk, Carm. We gotta prep,” Laura said, opening her backpack and fishing a stack of flashcards out of it. Carmilla frowned.

“Prep? What for? I thought you knew I didn’t study for history.”

“Yes and you still get the highest grade of the whole class, stop bragging. I meant for dinner.”

“What, you think I don’t know my table manners?” Carmilla laughed.

“No – Wow Carm, for someone with your GPA you think you’d be a whole lot smarter. I meant that we gotta get to know each other in order to make this believable.”

“So you brought flashcards?”

“Yes! It’s an effective and fun way to learn,” Laura said enthusiastically, seeming really proud of herself. She grinned at Carmilla, who in her turn rolled her eyes and closed the book she was reading. With Laura next to her, she wasn’t going to get much reading done anyway.

“Alright cupcake, what do you want me to do?”

 

 

 

 

“So, my dad is a …”

“Your dad is a vet and your stepmom works in insurances.”

“And what’s my age and favorite colors?”

“17, blue and purple. Terribly cliché.”

“Shut up. What are my hobbies?”

“You like to watch Doctor Who, read Harry Potter for the 100th time, you don’t play any instruments or do any sports, which, by the way, makes me wonder how you’re still in shape, and you like to visit zoos and children’s farms. Which is absolutely ridiculous bec –”

“Alright, alright, I get it. You know everything. So tell me about you,” Laura cut Carmilla off. The more Carmilla got to know about Laura, the more ridiculous she found her, but at the same time Laura noticed that Carmilla’s smiles were turning softer and she was groaning less. And when she _was_ groaning, she usually didn’t mean it.

Carmilla chuckled.

“There’s not a whole lot to know about me, cutie.”

“Good, so it’ll be easier to remember,” Laura said, always the optimist.

Carmilla seemed hesitant to start her story. She was drumming her fingers on her thighs, not looking directly at Laura. Laura leaned in a little, placed one hand on Carmilla’s knee and continued in a soft voice.

“Look, if this is too personal, I understand.”

Carmilla rolled her eyes.

“Don’t be stupid. You told me about you, I tell you about me.”

She was still silent for a while though, probably trying to figure out what she was going to say.

“So I used to live in that huge house that you probably pass on your way to school, the really modern one with the huge windows, with my mom and sister Mattie.”

“Oh, I know that house, it’s hu –”

One glare from Carmilla shut Laura up. She sat back and mimicked locking up her mouth and throwing the key away. Carmilla continued.

“It’s a very beautiful house, but I didn’t really have a good relationship with my mother, so as soon as I could, I moved out. Mattie moved out before me so my mom tried to get me to stay. She was really manipulative. Could make you feel really guilty, even though she was the one doing things wrong. This girl that I knew helped me realize that,” Carmilla said, her voice steady but soft. She looked down at her hands and then shook her head as if she couldn’t believe she’d spilled so much. When she continued, her words came out in a rush.

“So yeah, now I live in a very small, crappy apartment about 20 minutes away from here. I’m pretty sure you can guess what my favorite color is and in my spare time, I usually just lie in bed. And eat. A lot.”

Laura smiled at the lighter note. Carmilla looked up and Laura saw her at the most vulnerable she’d ever seen her before. Her eyes looked more sincere than Laura had ever seen them and she looked so unguarded. It caught Laura off guard.

Laura also felt a little guilty after Carmilla’s story. She’d been ranting to Carmilla about how bad of a parent her dad was, when Carmilla’s mom was so bad Carmilla moved out of the house because of it. And now she was dragging Carmilla into this whole plan of hers, while Carmilla might still have been processing everything that she’d been through with her mom.

“Uh oh. I recognize that overthinking face,” Carmilla noted, “And as much as I’d love to not get involved in this, I’m pretty sure I already am.”

“I just – I was thinking that with everything that happened between you and your mom, I should not have gotten you into this.”

Carmilla raised an eyebrow, “ _You_ didn’t get me into anything. I chose to get into this.”

“I know, but–”

“No buts, sweetheart. We’re both in this. And we’re staying in. Right?” Carmilla asked and Laura thought she saw insecurity on Carmilla’s face – but that couldn’t be right, Carmilla never looked anything but bored.

“Right,” Laura confirmed. Carmilla gave her something that looked like a smile and opened her book on the page she had clipped her paperclip to.

 

 

 

 

They sat in silence, Carmilla reading and Laura doing some homework.

“Carm?” Laura asked after a while.

“That nickname is here to stay for good, isn’t it?” Carmilla groaned.

“I don’t think you get to complain with all the nicknames you give me,” Laura retorted.

“Don’t you like them, creampuff?”

Laura just rolled her eyes. Carmilla smiled to herself.

“Anyway, what I wanted to ask – this girl you knew that helped you realize things about your mother, was she… were you…”

“In love with her? Yes,” Carmilla answered. She kept her eyes trained on the book in her lap. Laura bit her lip.

“Carm, if I’m standing in the way of something happening between you two, we need to stop this right now.”

Carmilla chuckled bitterly and shook her head.

“She didn’t want me, cupcake, so I kinda ruined that for myself already. Don’t worry.”

Laura noticed the way Carmilla refused to meet her eyes and thought, _Wow. That’s the second time she’s opening up to me today._ More than proud because they’d established this in their friendship, she was sad that Carmilla had anything to be vulnerable about.

“I’m sorry,” she said in a soft voice.

“’s what happens, cupcake. Life ain’t fair.”

“I guess,” Laura said, not agreeing with it but not wanting to argue Carmilla now, “What about Elsie? Are you, y’know, in love with her?”

Carmilla snorted, “Elsie? Where’d you get that idea?”

Laura shrugged, a little uncomfortable, “I don’t know, you’re around her very often and she knew where to find you.”

“Elsie’s just a study buddy. And she used to be an occasional hook-up, but that’s over now.”

Laura nodded.

(She wondered how Carmilla spoke of her when she wasn’t around.)

 

 

 

 

 

**Carmilla (6:24): What time does your dad expect me?**

**Laura (6:25): i told him you’d be here around 7**

**Carmilla (6:27): So I’ll be there around 7:10?**

**Laura (6:27): yeah, and don’t apologize**

**Carmilla (6:28): You didn’t have to tell me that, cupcake.**

 

Laura shoved her phone into her jean pocket and went downstairs. She’d dolled herself up a little, putting on eyeliner and a bit more mascara than usual, so her dad would think she’d want to look good for Carmilla. She wanted her dad to think Carmilla meeting her parents was important to her. Which it was, of course, but not for the reasons her dad would hopefully soon think.

“Dad?” she asked, walking down the stairs into the kitchen. She frowned, seeing he wasn’t there behind the stove like she’d expected.

She found him in the living room, cuddled up on the couch with Natalie. They were watching a movie, a big bowl of popcorn between them and Laura would have found it cute if she 1. didn’t hate the woman in her dad’s arms and 2. didn’t have a dinner with her fake-girlfriend planned that she had expected her dad to be preparing.

“Dad, Carmilla’s gonna be here at seven!” she said, her tone a little accusing.

“At seven? I thought she was coming at seven thirty!”

“No, Dad, I told you this morning, she’s gonna be here in,” Laura checked her watch, “twenty minutes!”

Her dad sat up a little, probably to prepare a very last-minute dinner, but Natalie didn’t move out of her position.

“Mark, you’re missing the best part.”

Laura’s dad looked as his girlfriend, looked back at Laura and said, “I’ll just warm up some leftovers from yesterday.”

“Dad, my girlfriend’s coming to dinner, you can’t just warm up some leftovers!” Laura said, indignant. She wasn’t only pissed at her dad, she was actually ashamed that she was gonna have to offer Carmilla the scraps of what they had for dinner last night. 

Mark raised his eyebrows, “Well, Laura, if you don’t like it, why don’t you cook something yourself?”

“No time now,” Laura mumbled, getting angrier by the second. She stormed back up to her room, sitting down on her bed and telling herself not to cry now. She didn’t wanna ruin the eyeliner.

(Even though her dad hadn’t even noticed she was wearing it.)

 

 

 

 

“Hey, so glad you’re here,” Laura said when Carmilla rang the bell at strictly ten past seven. She had to give it to Carmilla; she was late, but exactly at the time they’d agreed to.

Before Laura knew what she was doing, she lunged forward and wrapped her arms around Carmilla. Maybe it had something to do with the fact she had been trying not to cry for the past thirty minutes and her usual instinct when she felt so sad was to hug someone.

Carmilla froze for a second and Laura panicked – had she blown this night already? – until Carmilla rested her head on Laura’s shoulder and draped her arms around Laura’s back, still a little stiff but reciprocating.

“You arguing with your dad already?” Carmilla asked, something like softness in her voice. Laura pulled away, a little embarrassed at how easy to read she apparently was.

“How’d you know?”

“Been there, done that,” Carmilla shrugged.

“Yeah, well, anyway, all the more reason to do this, right?” Laura grabbed Carmilla’s hand and tugged her along.

“That’s the spirit,” Carmilla mumbled as she followed Laura to the dinner table.


	4. Chapter 4

“Camilla, how lovely to meet you,” Laura’s dad said, checking his watch swiftly to let Carmilla know she was late before he offered his hand. She acted like she hadn’t seen his small reprimand and shook his hand.

“It’s actually Carmilla,” was all she said. Laura’s dad tried not to let his frowning show, but Laura noticed and smiled to herself. This was going well.

“Excuse me, Carmilla, it’s quite an unusual name,” Mark justified.

“Well, not everyone names their kid Laura I guess.”

Laura snorted at Carmilla’s comment. Mark frowned, more visibly this time. Natalie smirked seeing the impression Carmilla made and Laura had to hide her face in Carmilla’s shoulder so Natalie wouldn’t see that Laura was actually smirking as well.

(And maybe also because she liked the contact.)

 

 

 

 

They sat down at the dinner table.

“They’re just leftovers from last night, sorry,” Laura said to Carmilla, genuinely sorry. Carmilla shrugged.

“’’s Okay. Nice change from all the pizza.”

“Your parents don’t cook?” Natalie asked. Laura saw Carmilla stiffen a little, which was invisible to her dad but made Laura put her hand on Carmilla’s knee, tracing circles there. Her dad noticed, which was a nice bonus.

“I don’t live with my parents anymore, I’ve got my own apartment,” Carmilla clarified.

“Your own apartment? That sounds good,” Laura’s dad commented.

“Yeah, it’s tiny and I barely make the rent every month but it’s nice to have my own place.”

Laura saw her dad gulp at Carmilla’s comment on her financial instability. She decided to add a little fuel to the fire.

“Maybe you should spend less money on tattoo’s,” she teased Carmilla. Carmilla smiled. She _did_ have a lot of tattoo’s.

“Oh, nice, tattoo’s! What kinds do you have?” Natalie asked.

Carmilla rolled up her sleeve to reveal the word “youth” in ink at the base of her inner elbow and a band filled with small stars around her arm. On her other arm, she had a small pair of fangs. Carmilla had told Laura they were for Mattie, because she’d always had such an obsession with vampires. Mattie, in return, had a bunch of stars tattooed on her own arm.

“How very nice,” Mark commented.

“I’ve also got one on my ankle and one right here,” Carmilla said, signaling to a spot on her ribcage, a little below her breast, “Your daughter really likes that one. Don’t you, Laura?” Carmilla asked, smirking at a blushing Laura.

Mark choked on his food and coughed.

 

 

 

 

“Do you mind if I light a cigarette? I always get a little antsy when I haven’t had one in a while,” Carmilla asked after they’d finished dinner.

“I’d rather you do that outside the house,” Mark said, “But we’re done here anyway. You two go outside, we’ll clean this up.”

Carmilla got up, “Well, thanks for dinner, Mark.”

“Mr. Hollis, please,” Mark said, his smile friendly but his eyes on fire.

“Of course, sorry. Guess we both get names mixed up, huh?” Carmilla joked. Mark kept the awkward smile on his face and started clearing the table, a sign for Carmilla and Laura to leave.

Carmilla held the door open for Laura and lead the girl to her car that was parked across the street. It was a black pick-up truck.

“A pick up? Hadn’t expected that,” Laura commented. Carmilla leant against the side of the car and grabbed a packet of cigarettes out of the pocket of her jacket. Laura didn’t recognize the brand and she figured that was because they were the cheapest cigarettes Carmilla’s local supermarket had.

“Well, I have to keep some of my secrets. Otherwise I’ll lose my air of mystery, won’t I?” Carmilla winked. Laura rolled her eyes.

“So, that went well,” Laura said after Carmilla had lit a cigarette. Laura didn’t really like smoke but she had to admit Carmilla made it look pretty good.

Carmilla nodded.

“Does your stepmonster always look at you like you’ve just burped?”

Laura snorted, “Yeah, that’s kind of her thing, I guess. I mean, she didn’t use to, but now she does.”

“What happened?”

Laura told Carmilla about Alex and what had happened when Natalie and Alex moved in. Carmilla whistled.

“That sounds pretty fucked up.”

Laura just hummed silently, agreeing. Carmilla tipped some ash off her cigarette and looked Laura in the eye.

“Y’know, when I still lived with my mother, she’d bring guys over all the time. There was this one guy who stayed for a while. He was really awful. He’d shout at me, provoke fights, that kinda stuff. He’d start a discussion with an absolutely ridiculous statement and I’d try to tell him why he was wrong, but he’d just laugh at me. My mother would laugh along. It would get me so worked up. Until at some point I stopped caring. He got bored and left.”

Carmilla told it all in a monotone voice, as if she hadn’t just shared an important part of her life with Laura. She ran a hand through her hair and looked down at her cigarette, about to light a new one when Laura flew into her arms, clenching herself onto Carmilla’s waist as if she was holding on for dear life. Carmilla smiled a little. She wasn’t a huge fan of hugs but holding Laura somehow wasn’t that bad.

“I’m so sorry,” Laura mumbled into Carmilla’s chest. Carmilla didn’t know what to say, so she just ran her hand up and down Laura’s arm softly.

Laura pulled away.

“If you ever need me to, y’know, annoy the hell out of your mom… I’d be happy to return the favour.”

Carmilla laughed softly, “Thanks. I’m pretty sure I’ve got that covered, though.”

(As Laura watched Carmilla drive away, she thought that this dinner had been useful as much more than just a way to piss her dad off.)

 

 

 

 

Laura walked into the history classroom on Monday with a scowl on her face.

She walked over to her table, surprised to find Carmilla already there. She was barely ever on time.

The surprise washed off quickly and she took her seat next to Carmilla, taking her books from her backpack and placing them on the table in front of her with a loud thud.

Carmilla looked up from what she was reading.

“Wow Sundance, what’s gotten into you? You looked pretty content when I left Saturday night,” Carmilla said with a smirk. Laura ignored how that was supposed to sound and sighed.

“I have to drive Alex here every Monday morning. He really got under my skin today.”

“What’d he do?”

“You know, the usual. He just makes me feel so uncomfortable. He’ll get into the car and watch me while I do everything, it’s just creepy. And he refuses to pay for gas,” Laura ranted.

“What a little dick,” Carmilla mumbled.

Laura nodded, agreeing.

“Don’t worry,” Carmilla said, fixing her a soft look, “He’s not in this class.”

Laura smiled, reassured by Carmilla’s soft eyes.

 

 

 

 

“So then the Doctor said, ‘And I suppose, if it’s my last chance to say it…-” Laura stopped talking, cut off by Carmilla’s arm dropping from her waist while Carmilla walked over to a table that definitely wasn’t their usual.

“Hey, I was in the middle of something,” she huffed, following Carmilla to wherever she was going.

Carmilla didn’t answer so Laura looked to see what she was staring at and frowned.

“Carm, the ride here was more than enough time spent with Alex today. We’re really not sitting with him at lunch!”

Carmilla looked back at her with a smirk.

“Trust me,” she said with a hint of amusement in her voice. Laura frowned even more, but followed Carmilla anyway.

“Well, well, well, look who we’ve got here,” Alex said as the two arrived at a table that was taken by Alex and three friends. Carmilla slammed her hands down on it.

“I’ve come to talk, you asshat, so I suggest you listen,” she said, her voice dripping with more anger than Laura had ever heard. When Carmilla talked about her mom, there was always hostility in her voice but she was usually very calm as well. Now, Carmilla was hissing and frowning and sounding furious.

Alex smirked, “What’d you wanna talk to me about?”

“The way you look at my girlfriend.”

Laura’s heart leaped at Carmilla’s words, probably because she’d never heard Carmilla call Laura her girlfriend before.

“What about it?” Alex said, acting as if he didn’t know anything but smirking in a way that told her something different.

“I’m telling you to stop looking at her like that. You know exactly what I mean.”

Alex laughed along with his friends. Laura saw Carmilla’s hand turn into a fist. Alex noticed as well, getting up and walking around the table so he was facing Carmilla.

“Or what?”

“Trust me, you don’t wanna find out,” Carmilla replied, her voice low and warning.

Laura just stood, watching the spectacle, unsure of what to do. Alex eyed her the way he usually did and that was enough for Carmilla.

“Well,” she shrugged, “I did warn him.”

Alex looked back at her when he heard that statement, but he wasn’t fast enough to avoid Carmilla’s knuckles hitting the place right below his cheekbones. He was so surprised that the fell to the ground, right on his nose, which started bleeding.

Before he could get up, the teacher that had been supervising the cafeteria rushed up to them.

(Laura looked at Carmilla and saw no sign of regret in her eyes, not even as they were being pushed away to the principal’s office.)

 

 

 

 

“Laura had nothing to do with this, sir.”

The principal took a glance at Laura and said, “I don’t think she did, miss Karnstein. What I’m wondering is why mr. Haven told me before this conversation with you two that he didn’t want me to call his mother.”

“Bet it had something to do with getting his ass kicked,” Carmilla mumbled. Laura snorted.

“Excuse me, what was that?” the principal asked and Carmilla smiled politely, her eyes big and her voice innocent.

“Nothing, sir, absolutely nothing.”

“Well, miss Karnstein, you’re getting a one afternoon suspension, starting right now. I expect you back tomorrow. As for you, miss Hollis, mr. Haven doesn’t want any word about this to his parents, so I trust you will respect his wishes. If not, I will have to give you a week of detention.”

“A week? That’s overreacting, sir,” Carmilla groaned, not even bothering to say anything about her own suspension.

The principal raised an eyebrow, “I think I will be the judge of that, miss Karnstein. May I remind you that it’s a conditional detention? Miss Hollis won’t get any punishment if she respects what her brother, the victim in this situation, wants.”

“Stepbrother,” Laura corrected, “But you’re right, sir. C’mon, Carm, let’s go.”

Laura dragged a grumbling Carmilla out of the principal’s office.

 

 

 

 

“You should get those knuckles checked, y’know.”

“Well, I don’t believe the school nurse likes me very much and if she hears that I’m suspended – which she definitely will, because this is high school and word travels – she’ll only just send me away,” Carmilla shrugged.

“You know the school nurse?”

“I wouldn’t call it knowing…”

“But you’ve been in her office enough to get her to dislike you?”

“What, you think that was the first time I got in a fight?” Carmilla smirked. Laura looked down, blushing a little.

“Wow, I almost thought I was special,” she said, looking back up, trying to make a joke out of it but failing. Carmilla looked at her, eyes softening a little.

“Well, I’ve got to admit, this was the first time I fought _for_ someone. I almost feel like a knight now.”

“Don’t you think for a second that I’m a damsel in distress,” Laura said, rolling her eyes but smiling.

“Don’t worry, cupcake. I said almost.”

“Yeah, well, thanks anyway,” Laura said. She doubted for a minute but, looking into Carmilla’s eyes, stood on her tiptoes to press a kiss to Carmilla’s cheek anyway.

Carmilla smiled.

“No better prize for a knight than a fair maid’s kiss.”

“Well, thank you for ruining the moment,” Laura said, rolling her eyes again. Carmilla grinned.

“See you tomorrow, sweetheart.”

(Laura’s heart did some kind of jump that had absolutely _nothing_ to do with how genuine Carmilla sounded saying ‘sweetheart’.)

 


	5. Chapter 5

“Laura, I think we should talk,” Perry said as Laura arrived at their lunch table the afternoon after the fight with Alex. Laura put her plate down slowly, taking in the looks on Danny and LaFontaine’s faces as she sat down cautiously.

“What is this, some kind of intervention?” she joked, but Danny didn’t laugh and LaFontaine avoided looking her in the eye.

“We tried talking to you before, Laura, but you’re always around Carmilla lately…” Perry trailed off. Laura frowned.

“You can still talk to me when I’m with Carmilla.”

“C’mon Laura, you know she’s not exactly our best friend,” Danny commented, clenching her teeth.

“What I know is that you never actually gave her the chance to _be_ your best friend,” Laura replied, raising one eyebrow at Danny. She looked at LaFontaine for comfort, but they were staring at their spaghetti as if it was a science project.

“That girl has a bad influence on you, Laura,” Perry started again, “You never got into fights before you met her!”

“You say that as if I now beat people up every other day,” Laura snorted. None of her friends laughed though. Perry and Danny just stared at her as if she was crazy and they were the only sane ones left in the school.

Laura felt a spark in her start to ignite. She sighed, not wanting to get in a fight with her friends when she was already on bad terms with her family.

“She got suspended and you kissed her cheek like it was a good thing to be sent away from school!” Danny accused.

“She got suspended because she stood up for me! So stop being so fucking jealous and don’t make her seem like the bad guy when _you guys_ are the ones judging her without reason!” Laura snapped. She had tried to stay calm, but she would not have Danny shaming her for something that had felt intimate and right to her, something Danny wasn’t even supposed to be involved in. Danny blushed and Laura knew she had pushed the right button by commenting on Danny’s jealousy. She loved Danny, but only as a friend and her overprotectiveness was getting too much sometimes.

When no one said anything, no apologies, Laura took her tray, gave her friends one last look and walked out of the cafeteria.

(She found Carmilla outside, sitting at the base of a tree and took place next to her. Carmilla didn’t ask Laura anything, just scooched over a bit and continued reading her book. Laura liked the silence.)

 

 

 

 

Laura spent more and more time with Carmilla that week. She hadn’t really had the chance to talk things over with her friends yet – to be fair, they hadn’t really apologized to her yet, except for LaFontaine, who showed up blushing from shame an hour after the fight – so she usually sat with Carmilla at lunch. She found this was the most effective way to get to know Carmilla: she tried reading Carmilla’s books over her shoulder (though the language was usually too complicated for her), ate Carmilla’s pizza crust when it was pizza day and at the end of the week, they even had a usual position: both with their backs against the tree, Carmilla’s arm over Laura’s shoulder and Laura’s head on Carmilla’s shoulder on days when she was tired. She learned when to be touchy with Carmilla and when not. In her turn, Carmilla learned when to make sarcastic remarks and when not. Carmilla still annoyed the hell out of Laura sometimes, but Carmilla’s soft smile could usually fix that.

“Cupcake?” Carmilla said on Tuesday, one week after the argument.

“Hm?” Laura said, looking up from her phone and forgetting her effort not to reply to the nickname.

“As much as I enjoy your company,” Carmilla said and Laura swore she was trying to make her voice as sarcastic as possible, “don’t you think it’s time you talk to your friends again?”

Laura sighed, pressing the stand-by button on her phone and pocketing it.

“I kinda think they should talk to me first.”

Carmilla snorted, “Wow, that’s officially the most childish thing you’ve ever said.”

Laura scooched away from Carmilla’s shoulder, frowning indignantly. The reason she was fighting with her friends in the first place was because of Carmilla and now Carmilla was telling her not to fight?

“You don’t even know what the fight was about!”

“So tell me,” Carmilla replied, surprising Laura. She hadn’t thought Carmilla would care enough about her and her friends to actually want to talk to her about the argument.

“Okay,” she said apprehensively and explained the situation. Carmilla ran a hand through her hair.

“You should go talk to them.”

“Carm –”

“Cupcake, this fake relationship is not worth getting in a fight for.”

Laura felt something sinking at the bottom of her stomach and she didn’t know why.

“Well, _you_ are.”

Carmilla laughed bitterly, “No, I’m not and as much as I hate going anywhere near Xena the warrior princess, we’re going to the ginger losers’ lunch table next lunch.”

Laura raised an eyebrow, “Really? Ginger losers? That’s the best you could do?”

Carmilla tried to hide her smile, “Shut up.”

 

 

 

 

“Do we have to do this?” Laura whined.

“Believe me, I’m not exactly excited to see them either,” Carmilla grumbled, but she kept her grip on Laura’s wrist, yanking her towards her old lunch table. LaFontaine, Perry and Danny were already there, accompanied by Kirsch. Laura wondered who the hell was gonna keep Danny and Kirsch from attacking each other when she wasn’t there.

“C’mon, do it for Puppy Face. Ginger Jolly Giant will tear him to shreds without you there,” Carmilla said, reading Laura’s thoughts.

Laura rolled her eyes, “Fine.”

Carmilla’s eyes glanced over her face quickly before she lead Laura to the table. She stopped right in front of it, putting her hand on the small of Laura’s back and giving her a soft push forward.

“Hey,” Laura said a little awkwardly.

“Laura!” Perry said, seeming excited to see her, “How lovely to see you.”

Danny just nodded at her, eyeing Carmilla suspiciously.

“You could’ve seen me anytime the past week, if you’d just come to my locker or something,” Laura said, not being able to keep the comment in.

“Yeah…” Perry said, trailing off. She looked at Carmilla as if to say that she hadn’t come to see Laura because she was around Carmilla all the time – which, to be fair, was true, but also the reason they’d started this whole argument anyway.

“No. You do _no_ t get to blame this on Carmilla,” Laura said, slamming her hands down on the lunch table, “Carmilla is the whole reason I came over to apologize to you guys anyway. But I guess I don’t really have to anymore, because this just affirms how wrong I was to come over here.”

“Laura,” Carmilla said from behind her, her tone soothing. Laura closed her eyes, breathing in and out. She bent forward, placing her hand on the table and sending both Perry and Danny a glare.

“Look, I know it’s hard to accept a new person into our group, but Carmilla is my friend and either you stop blaming her for efforts _you guys_ did not make, like reaching out to me last week, or I spend the rest of my lunches with her.”

“Clear,” Danny mumbled. Perry nodded. Laura sighed.

“Good,” she said, “because I really missed you guys.”

Perry smiled widely at that and got up to grab Laura in a hug. Laura sunk into Perry’s arms, the tension dripping from her shoulders.

“You were actually scaring me a little,” Kirsch said from the other side of the table. Laura laughed as she took a seat opposite him.

She looked over at Carmilla, who was still waiting a few feet away from the table, looking a little uncomfortable.

“Come sit, Carm,” she said and she sighed contently as Carmilla took the seat next to her.

 

 

 

 

“Well, Carmilla, it was lovely having you over again,” Mark said, his tone suggesting something entirely different.

This had been Carmilla’s second dinner with the family and it had gone just as disastrous (or, in Laura’s eyes: incredible) as the first. She’d had her hand on Laura’s thigh the whole dinner and Mark had immediately noticed when Laura started stuttering and stumbling over her words.

Alex hadn’t said anything all dinner, just sending Carmilla glares once in a while. Natalie had been questioning Carmilla all dinner, hoping to get information out of Carmilla that would make Mark hate her even more. Laura thought it was amazing how Natalie thought she was ruining Laura’s life when in truth, she was actually doing exactly what Laura wanted her to.

Carmilla nodded.

“Thanks for the food Mark, it was really nice.”

“Still haven’t told her to call me Mark yet,” Laura heard her dad mumble under his breath as Carmilla made her way to the door. She smirked.

Like last time, Carmilla made her way over to her pick-up parked across the road. She lit a cigarette and Laura watched as she blew circles of smoke. Laura had never admitted it, but she’d always had a thing for girls with cigarettes, even though she hated the smell of it. Who could blame her, really, when Carmilla looked so attractive with that white stick between her lips?

Carmilla caught her watching and raised an eyebrow.

“Can I have a drag?”

“Don’t be stupid,” Carmilla replied, without a doubt.

“What, you don’t like sharing?” Laura teased.

“I don’t like your lungs turning black.”

Laura felt something in her stomach at Carmilla’s answer and told herself that it was definitely not her stomach doing a flip because Carmilla actually cared enough about her health to stop her from smoking.

Even though that was incredibly hypocritical.

“What, so you can smoke and I can’t?”

“Exactly,” Carmilla said, taking the cigarette from her mouth and stomping on it, even though it wasn’t even halfway finished yet.

“You suck.”

“That’s not really what a lesbian does, sweetheart. I thought you knew that,” Carmilla said with a smirk. Laura couldn’t help but laugh a little.

“Okay, I think that’s enough for tonight. I’ll be going now.” Carmilla stayed put though, awkwardly waiting but not wanting to initiate the hug.

Laura rolled her eyes and pulled Carmilla in for a hug. She felt Carmilla relax against her body instantly, something that always made her feel proud. Sometimes it was difficult to be friends with Carmilla (or to be her fake girlfriend) because of her sarcastic comments and how downright mean she was sometimes, but for some reason she always seemed to make an exception for Laura. She was never really snarky to Laura anymore, let Laura rant to her about math and didn’t stiffen anymore when Laura hugged her.

“I’m pretty sure your dad’s watching us,” Carmilla whispered into Laura’s ear. Laura’s stomach did that stupid thing again.

“Good,” Laura said. Carmilla leaned back from the hug to raise an eyebrow at Laura, but before she could fully do so, Laura had leaned in and pressed her lips against Carmilla’s.

She moved at a soft speed, wrapping her arms around Carmilla’s neck and letting them lean on Carmilla’s shoulder. Carmilla bent down a little to meet her lips, placing her hands on Laura’s waist to pull Laura closer into her. Laura fastened the kiss and Carmilla moved along before she bit Laura’s lip softly and pulled away. She didn’t pull away too far, so Laura took the opportunity to rest her forehead against Carmilla’s.

“This okay?” she asked softly, with her eyes still closed. Carmilla had said before that she was in for anything and that it was all up to Laura, but Laura still felt guilty that she didn’t ask Carmilla about it before their kiss.

“Yeah,” Carmilla said. Laura took a step back to study Carmilla and check if she really was okay, but she was surprised when Carmilla seemed to be composing herself, running a hand through her hair and regulating her breathing.

“Wow,” Laura smirked, “didn’t think I’d have such an effect on the school’s lady killer.”

For a moment Laura thought she saw a blush creeping up to Carmilla’s cheeks, but Carmilla smirked instead.

“What can I say, cupcake, you’re an excellent kisser. Let’s do this again sometime,” she said, shooting Laura a wink and giving her a quick kiss on the cheek before disappearing into her vehicle.

 

(Laura had to admit she was a little proud to have made Carmilla speechless. But most of all, she kept tracing her lips the rest of the evening, one she spent in her room because her dad refused to look at her.)

 

 

 

 

They started spending more and more time at Laura’s house, most days just watching Disney movies in Laura’s room, sharing her bed as Carmilla tried to catch popcorn with her mouth. Other days Carmilla would bring her guitar and play Laura acoustic covers of punk songs that Carmilla wanted to share with her, while Laura traced the tattoo on Carmilla’s ankle.

One day they had a food fight while they were baking brownies. Laura started wiping her flour-covered fingers off on Carmilla’s leather pants. Carmilla, in return, reacted by grabbing a hand of flour and dropping it on Laura’s hair. Laura did a hair flip in order to get the flour on Carmilla, but failed miserably as it flew all around the kitchen. Carmilla smirked, dipped her finger in the batter bowl and smeared it on the top of Laura’s nose, making a trail down to Laura’s upper lip.

Laura whined and Carmilla said something along the lines of “Let me fix that” before she leaned in and kissed Laura softly, licking the brownie batter from her lip and pulling Laura in by the waist.

(For a minute, Laura’s heart jumped because Carmilla didn’t need to do that. It had no relevance for their plan whatsoever. That was until her dad stormed in and Laura realized that Carmilla had a perfect view from the kitchen on the driveway, where her dad’s car must’ve pulled up a minute ago.)

 

 

 

 

The first time they hung out at Carmilla’s place was a little weird, because Laura knew that without her family around, they didn’t have to do any pretending, yet Carmilla had still invited her over for dinner. Carmilla had made her spaghetti bolognaise and Laura felt really honored that Carmilla would go through such effort for her.

“That was really lovely,” Laura said when they were cleaning the dishes.

“That’s about the fourth time you said that, cupcake.”

“I’m just happy you’d cook for me,” Laura admitted. Carmilla looked up from the dishes, eyeing Laura.

“What?” Laura asked, a little worried from the way Carmilla looked at her.

“Of course I’d do that for you,” Carmilla said in a soft voice.

“Well, I’m sorry I got a little confused by the whole ‘I’m badass and won’t make an effort for anyone, poptart’-act,” Laura said, playing it off as if she wasn’t serious.

Carmilla shrugged, “It’s different with you.”

Laura raised an eyebrow, willing Carmilla to keep talking.

“Well, if you tell anyone I said this I will deny it, but I guess you’re my best friend.”

 

(Laura smiled and shuffled over to wrap her arms around Carmilla, but it was all a little bittersweet because this was the first time she felt like friendship wasn’t enough.)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is like, way too unedited and i'm way too tired to even read through it right now, but you guys have all been so kind to me & i wanted to give you something. so here it is. please let me know if you notice any mistakes. enjoy :)

The first time they really made out was in Laura’s room. They were in her bed, watching a movie and cuddling – although Carmilla preferred any word but that one for what they were doing – when Carmilla came up with the idea that their relationship would gain credibility if they were kissing when Alex walked past Laura’s room. The Hollis house had an open door policy, so Alex saw them every time he walked past Laura’s room to go to the bathroom or Laura’s dad’s office. Laura instantly agreed with Carmilla’s plan and pressed her lips upon Carmilla’s eagerly.

Laura’s hands cupped Carmilla’s face like they usually did when the girls were kissing and Carmilla kept her hands steady at Laura’s waist. Laura heard footsteps passing her room, but she didn’t want to leave Carmilla’s lips and she didn’t want to think about Alex, so instead she deepened the kiss, licking the inside of Carmilla’s mouth. Carmilla made a surprised noise that made Laura slide her hands down, grab a fist of Carmilla’s flannel and pull her closer.

Carmilla let go of Laura’s waist and tangled her hands into Laura’s hair before Laura climbed on top of Carmilla and Carmilla sat up a little to keep their lips connected. Laura had something else in mind though – she started kissing Carmilla’s neck, making Carmilla hum softly with joy. Carmilla’s hands slid from Laura’s hair to Laura’s hips and back up until they were beneath her t-shirt, touching the skin of Laura’s waist and ribs, which turned Laura on incredibly.

There was a cough from the doorway and Laura removed her head from Carmilla’s neck to see her dad with his arms crossed. Laura blushed and Carmilla removed her hands from under Laura’s t-shirt.

“I think it’s time you go home, Carmilla,” he said in a stern voice. Carmilla shifted a bit, so Laura rolled off of her.

“See ya, cutie,” Carmilla said with a wink as she walked down the stairs, followed on her tail by Laura’s dad.

 

(Laura wondered what would’ve happened if her dad hadn’t interfered. She didn’t think she would have minded if he hadn’t.)

 

 

 

 

Something changed after that day. Laura started noticing the first time Carmilla missed history class. Carmilla never missed history – one of the reasons she got high grades without studying was that she paid so much attention in class.

 

**Laura (11:01): where are you? :(**

 

She didn’t get a reply.

Laura didn’t see Carmilla all day, although LaFontaine said she had shown up to biology and Perry had seen her in English. Laura shook it off, convinced that Carmilla would show up tomorrow with a good explanation.

Carmilla did indeed show up the next day.

“Hey!” Laura said, excited to see her again, “Where were you yesterday?”

Carmilla sat down at the table next to Laura, grabbing her books from her bag.

“Didn’t really feel like it,” she said with a shrug. Laura observed her. Her eyes and voice weren’t as soft as usual, her shoulders were squared and her hair was in a bun.

“Are you okay?” Laura asked, placing a hand on Carmilla’s knee. Carmilla looked up and scooted away from Laura’s touch as if she had been burned.

“Fine,” she mumbled and shifted her attention to the teacher.

Laura frowned.

(She didn’t know what to say, so she just kept her mouth shut during class. And at lunch, when Carmilla didn’t show up to their table and wasn’t beneath the big tree outside.)

 

 

 

 

Carmilla showed up to history after that, but she never sat with Laura and her friends at lunch anymore. Laura pretty much worked out on her own that Carmilla had to be avoiding her. There couldn’t be another reason for never seeing Carmilla at her locker anymore and Carmilla’s constant being in the library at lunch, knowing that Laura didn’t like the place much.

When Laura realized Carmilla was avoiding her, she felt a pang of sadness.

Suddenly, she felt how much Carmilla had started to mean to her.

She missed the feeling of Carmilla relaxing in her arms, of Carmilla’s lips against hers, of Carmilla’s hands cupping her face. She missed texting Carmilla until midnight and calling Carmilla to rant about Doctor Who. She missed Carmilla’s pretentious comments, she missed Carmilla stealing her yellow pillow during sleepovers, she missed Carmilla’s stupid nicknames. She missed Carmilla’s tattoo’s and how Carmilla played Laura music when she was sad.

But most of all, she missed the softness in Carmilla’s eyes.

These days, Carmilla looked at her as if she was just another 17-year-old girl, which Laura supposed she was. Carmilla had just always made her feel so special. But now there was no softness in her tone, just mumblings in Laura’s direction.

It made Laura feel like she was worth nothing.

 

 

 

Laura was on her bed that evening, studying in an effort to forget about everything that was going on, when her dad barged into her room.

“Laura, why haven’t you taken the trash out yet?”

Laura looked up and said in a tired voice, “It’s Alex’s turn, dad.”

“Alex says it’s your turn.”

“I took the trash out yesterday. It’s Alex’s turn today.”

“Can’t you just do it?” her dad huffed. Laura frowned.

“Why should I do it when it’s Alex’s turn?”

“Why do you only think of yourself?” her dad asked, suddenly shouting.

“Why do you pick his side immediately?” Laura asked, trying to keep her voice from trembling.

She hated it when people shouted at her. Her dad knew this; he barely shouted at her. She didn’t understand why he’d just come barging into her room suddenly and start shouting at her for something that wasn’t even her fault.

She bit her lip. God, only thinking about the situation she was in right now made her wanna start crying.

“Because you’re being selfish, Laura! You’ve been selfish ever since Alex and Natalie moved in. You don’t wanna share anything, not your house, not your car, not even my attention! I guess that’s what happens when children grow up an only child. Your mom and I should’ve raised you better. I’m starting to really dislike your behavior, Laura. I bet she would too.”

Laura shook her head at those words, tears filling her eyes, “Don’t you dare drag mom into this. _You_ are the one who got a girlfriend that hates me with a son that always looks at me like I’m his prey. _You_ are the one who didn’t do anything when I came to you for protection. _You_ are the one she’d be starting to dislike now.”

To Laura’s surprise, her dad was quiet for a while. He looked as if he didn’t know what to say, as if Laura’s words had hit him as much as his words had hit Laura. When he finally opened his mouth, Laura felt a strong urge to shut him up. She really didn’t want to hear what he had to say. He had hurt her enough today.

“Get out,” she said. He just stood there, staring at her instead of moving.

“Get out of my room!” she shouted. He turned around and walked out of the room, leaving the door open behind him. Laura shut the door before crawling onto her bed and crying into her pillow.

She cried harder than she had in the past few months. As soon as the tears came, she felt what kind of crying it was. She had done a lot of this sort of crying when her mom died. It was the kind of crying that wouldn’t stop on its own. Laura knew that if she didn’t stop crying and talk to someone, she’d start hyperventilating and things would go wrong.

She waited for a while, just lying on her bed and crying, in the hope that it would be a little relieving. It wasn’t though: the sadness she felt in the pit of her stomach only got worse. She knew what she had to do when this happened.

She grabbed her phone from her desk and thought of who to call. LaFontaine and Perry were on a date, she didn’t wanna disturb them. Danny was at work and Kirsch was at basketball practice, so they both wouldn’t be able to answer. She bit her lip. She _really_ needed to stop crying.

She tried calling LaFontaine, knowing that even if they were on a date, they’d insist Laura’s happiness was more important, but their phone was off. When Laura called Perry’s phone and it was off as well, she figured they were in the cinema.

She puffed out a breath and felt how fast her breathing was going. There was only one option left.

“What is it, cupcake?” Carmilla answered the voice in an annoyed tone.

“Carm? I – I’m sorry, I didn’t know,” Laura said, taking a pause to sniff in some air and try to make her voice sound like she wasn’t crying as hard as she was, “I didn’t know who else to call.”

“I’ll be there in five. Hold on.”

  


Carmilla arrived five minutes later, true to her word. Laura had been looking out the window, waiting for Carmilla’s car to arrive, when she spotted the black pick-up truck making its way to her house at an alarming speed. Carmilla pulled up just in time to stop in front of the right house and pulled the keys out of the ignition, slamming the car door shut as she got out.

She walked up to Laura’s house and soon Laura heard the doorbell ring. She wondered if she should go downstairs, wanting to rush into Carmilla’s arms but not wanting her dad to see her like this. It was decided for her when she heard the door shuffling open and Carmilla saying, “Where’s Laura?” in a harsh voice. Alex replied quickly, probably afraid he’d get hurt if he didn’t inform Carmilla that Laura was in her room.

Next, Laura heard Carmilla running up the stairs, her pace slowing down when she got to the top of the stairs. If Laura hadn’t been still crying so hard, she’d have rolled her eyes at that, because it was _so_ Carmilla to act as if she hadn’t gotten through any effort to get to Laura as quick as possible. There was a knock on Laura’s door and Laura took a seat on her bed as she sobbed an invitation.

Carmilla opened the door, her eyes big and worried, all of the hardness from the past weeks gone as she rushed over to Laura.

“Hey,” Carmilla said, her voice soft. The softness embraced Laura like a hug and she was so happy that it was back, but also so scared that it’d leave again, which lead her to only start crying harder.

“Can I hug you?” Carmilla asked and it was the first time she was the one asking, not Laura. Laura nodded and Carmilla sat down on Laura’s bed next to her. She opened her arms for Laura to curl into, which Laura did immediately. She clutched onto Carmilla’s waist like it was a lifeline while Carmilla played with her hair.

“Breathe,” Carmilla whispered into her hair and Laura obeyed, surprised at how much easier it was to do so now that Carmilla was here.

“Carm, I can’t – I can’t stop,” Laura sobbed, annoyed at how desperate she sounded.

“You wanna go to my apartment?”

Laura nodded – any chance to escape her house right now was great.

  


Carmilla hadn’t said anything in the car and even when they arrived, she just opened the car door for Laura silently, took her by the hand and led her up the stairs to her apartment. Once she had opened the door, she took Laura to the queen-size bed in the corner of the room and sat her down. Without saying anything, she walked over to the kitchen and started filling a pan with milk. Laura took her shoes off and crawled towards the headboard of the bed, leaning her back against it as she tried to stop crying – without success.

She couldn’t stop thinking of her dad and how betrayed she felt when he used Laura’s mom to tell her off. How could he do that? He knew how much her mom’s approval meant to Laura. How could he use her to get Laura to do what he wanted? Laura knew Natalie had changed him, but she didn’t know it was this bad. It was as if the dad she had known all her life had been erased completely and a stranger had stepped in for him.

Carmilla returned from the kitchen with a cup of hot coco and placed it on the nightstand, next to Laura.

“It’s still hot,” she explained.

Laura nodded through her tears. Carmilla kicked off her shoes as well and came crawling towards Laura. She settled next to Laura, turned towards her.

“I – he said some things about – about my mother and I…” Laura started, but she hated how her voice sounded and the sobs stopped her from talking.

“You don’t have to talk about it,” Carmilla said, leaning in a little to wipe the tears from Laura’s cheeks. The sweet gesture only made Laura cry harder.

Carmilla noticed and said, “C’mere.”

She pulled Laura into her, kissing the top of her head. Laura grabbed a hand of Carmilla’s t-shirt in her fist in some desperate effort to hold on as tightly to Carmilla as possible. She sobbed into Carmilla’s chest as she felt Carmilla’s fingers curl around her back, holding her close. Carmilla gently rocked her back and forth as she ran her fingers through Laura’s hair. They sat like that until the tears stopped coming. Laura felt a little better, but most of all she was exhausted.

As if she could read Laura’s mind, Carmilla let go of Laura and walked over to her closet. She fished a pair of pajamas out of a drawer and took them to Laura.

“I’ll be in the bathroom,” she said, meaning that Laura could go ahead and change without the idea that Carmilla was watching her.

When Carmilla came back, Laura was wearing her pajamas and had just finished the hot coco Carmilla had made for her, which wasn’t really hot anymore but delicious anyway. Laura looked up at the sound of the bathroom door and had to stop her jaw from dropping when she saw that Carmilla was only wearing an oversized t-shirt and a pair of boxers. If Carmilla noticed Laura’s stare, she didn’t show it. Instead, she walked to the light switch and flipped it. By the time she had walked back to the bed, Laura had already crawled in. Carmilla slipped in next to her. She faced Laura, tracing her jawline with a finger.

“You okay?” she asked softly.

“I don’t know. I’m just really tired,” Laura said in a small voice. She turned around, facing the other side of the room and placing Carmilla’s arm on her hip. Carmilla got the hint: she wrapped her arms around Laura’s waist entirely, locked their knees together and pressed a sweet kiss to the back of Laura’s neck.

(Laura fell asleep to the feeling of Carmilla’s breath on her neck and it was the best she’d slept all week.)

 

 

 

 

Things got back to normal pretty soon after that. Carmilla sat with Laura at lunch again and talked to her during history class.

There was one thing that had changed: Carmilla never called Laura nicknames anymore. She had now taken to calling Laura by her name, a development Laura enjoyed. However, she did have to admit that she missed the way her stomach did a tiny jump when Carmilla called her cutie.

It still did those tiny jumps, though, like when Carmilla slid her arm around Laura’s waist and rested her head on Laura’s shoulder. Or when Carmilla did that amazing trick with her tongue when they were kissing. Or that time Carmilla used her the loops of Laura’s belt to pull Laura into her.

(It happened too much, really. But Laura tried not to think of that.) 


	7. Chapter 7

On Saturday night, Laura stood in front of LaFontaine’s house with a pack of chocolate chip cookies in her sweaty hands. She hadn’t been this nervous to see her friends since she’d had her first sleepover at this very house.

Even though they’d made up after the argument they’d had about Carmilla, from that moment on things had changed. Carmilla had become a priority. She still saw her friends at school, but she barely really hung out with them anymore because she was often around Carmilla at the times her friends wanted to meet up.

This night, however, Carmilla had insisted Laura would do something with her friends. When Laura had said that Carmilla should at least tag along, Carmilla had mumbled that missing Laura on a Saturday night would be enough of a sacrifice without getting the punishment of hanging out with Laura’s friends as well.

Laura had reluctantly agreed to hanging out with her friends – don’t get this wrong, she loved them, she really did, but lately, she had just felt like they didn’t really get her. They hadn’t really approved of her whole fake relationship-plan to begin with, but then they’d never really tried to understand why she did it anyway. And she knew they tried not to show it, but their disapproval was obvious every time she talked about it. With everything going on in her life right now, their disapproval just wasn’t something she needed.

So she’d started missing out on movie marathons and dinners and other hang-outs, to the point where she’d avoided them altogether. This evening was the first time she’d actually accepted an invitation again and it made her stomach churn to think about what her friends must be thinking about the fact she hadn’t shown up for so long.

What if they’d been talking about her? What if they’d seen her as a traitor or someone who chose relationships – fake relationships, because what Carmilla and Laura had definitely wasn’t real, that would be _crazy_ – over friendships?

They hadn’t really changed much at school, but Laura couldn’t help but worry that they would be distant to her during this hangout. Maybe she didn’t fit in anymore, at least not with these hangouts. Maybe she’d given up her spot.

_There’s only one way to find out_ , Laura thought as she rang the doorbell.

 

Perry opened the door, as she often did when at LaFontaine’s house. The two had been best friends for as long as Laura could remember and had also been dating for two years, so it was safe to say Perry spent enough time at LaFontaine’s house to feel comfortable enough to open the door when the doorbell rang.

“Laura!” Perry said, her face lighting up as soon as she saw the girl in front of her.

“Hey,” Laura said, nerves obvious in her voice. Perry smiled reassuringly.

“I’m very glad you’re here,” she said as she held the door open for Laura to step into the house. Laura shuffled over the threshold and hesitantly took off her jacket, as if she hadn’t ever been to LaFontaine’s house before.

She followed Perry into the living room. The room was dark except for the bright light of the TV. It revealed LaFontaine, Danny and Kirsch sitting on the couch with a table of snacks in front of them. Laura recognized a bag of Dorito Roulettes, a large bowl of popcorn, skittles and some bottles of coke.

“Hey guys,” she said, awkwardly making her way to the couch behind Perry.

“Hi little nerd,” Kirsch said with a broad smile, getting up as soon as he saw Laura and pulling her into a hug. She smiled against his chest, knowing that whatever her other friends were gonna say, at least she’d always have Kirsch on her side.

“Oh Laura, thank God you’re here, please come sit next to me so I don’t have to sit next to mister McStupid anymore,” Danny said with an eye roll and Kirsch immediately let go of Laura, turning around to argue with Danny.

“They’ve been like this since the moment they got here,” a tired-looking LaFontaine said. Laura took a seat next to them.

“Always the same with them,” Laura said, still a little uneasy. LaFontaine smiled slightly.

“Anyway, it’s good to actually see you in my house again,” they said. Laura blushed. She knew there was gonna be at least one remark tonight and it didn’t surprise her that it was from LaFontaine.

“Yeah,” she mumbled, “Sorry.”

“’s Okay. I’m just glad you’re here,” LaFontaine said in a soft voice. Laura smiled as LaFontaine squeezed their shoulder carefully.

Danny turned around, apparently having won her argument with Kirsch and said, “Hey, we gonna get this movie started or not?”

Laura watched as Perry rushed into the living room from the kitchen with a fresh batch of brownies that smelled wonderful. She watched as Perry put them on the table in front of them and slapped away LaFontaine’s hand, making a remark about how they were going to get burned if they didn’t look out. She watched as Danny and Kirsch cooperated on how to sneak away the bowl of popcorn and then started fighting about where it should stand. She watched as LaFontaine grabbed the remote and started the film, cuddling up to Perry.

Suddenly, she really missed Carmilla.

But at the same time, she felt really happy to be spending a whole night with her friends again. She was grateful that they accepted her back with open arms and made a note to herself to not ever mess this up again. Carmilla was right – these people knew her better than anyone and they were where she belonged, whether she needed some space sometimes or not. And even if she did need some space, she knew she could always come back here.

Yeah, Carmilla had been right all along.

Danny must’ve seen her thinking. She wrapped an arm around Laura and pulled her in a little.

“You okay?” she whispered. Laura nodded.

 

(She cried at the end of the movie. Even though it was a comedy.)

 

 

 

 

Danny drove Laura to Carmilla’s that night, since Carmilla had driven her to LaFontaine’s. She’d spent the afternoon at Carmilla’s house, so her car was there, but for some reason it had seemed like a good idea for Carmilla to take her to LaFontaine’s. Maybe it was because she was so nervous Carmilla thought she would crash her car.

“So you’re staying at Carmilla’s?” Danny asked halfway through the car ride.

“Yeah,” Laura affirmed. She wasn’t sure if she was actually gonna be staying at Carmilla’s tonight, but then again she probably was since she’d been avoiding her house lately and Carmilla was happy to have her most of the time. Even though she would never admit it.

Danny nodded and there was an awkward silence until they pulled up in front of Carmilla’s building.

“Thank you for taking me here, you’re the sweetest,” Laura said, shooting Danny a soft smile.

Danny just smiled back, seeming to be lost in thoughts, but when Laura was about to open the door, she stopped her.

“Laura, wait.”

Laura turned back to Danny, having a slight idea of what Danny was about to say.

“I know you don’t really wanna hear all this, but I’d like to think that friends sometimes do what’s best for their friend, no matter how much it will change the friendship, so I’m gonna say it anyway,” Danny started, seeming to prepare not only Laura, but also herself for what was coming next.

Laura nodded, a little more nervous now.

“I want you to know that what I’m about to say has nothing to do with my past feelings for you. I really liked you but we both know we wouldn’t have worked out, and that’s okay. I’m over it. But I do feel like I need to tell you to watch out with Carmilla.”

“Danny, we’ve had this-” Laura started with a sigh, but Danny cut her off.

“No, no, listen to me,” she said, grabbing Laura’s hand and looking completely serious, “I know that Carmilla’s not some sort of demon. I mean, she’s annoying and downright mean sometimes, but she’s a good person. That’s not what I’m talking about. What I’m talking about is that I can see you falling for her.”

Laura’s hard skipped a beat at Danny’s words and she could feel herself start blushing. She looked at her shoes, not sure what to say, but luckily for her, Danny continued talking.

“Laura, I say this as your friend. I will support you in whatever you do and whoever you choose to date, whether I like them or not. But please do make sure they feel the same for you. Please make sure they’re not just stringing you along for the fun or leading you on or anything. Take whatever you’re feeling seriously and love yourself enough to let go of someone if they’re not treating you the way you want to be treated. Can you promise me to try to do that?”

Laura looked up and saw Danny giving her one of the most serious and genuine stares Danny had ever given her. It made Laura feel bad about trying to cut Danny off earlier and not listening to her advice. Danny honestly had Laura’s best interest in mind and if there was anyone of her friends who was really looking out for her right now, it was Danny.

Laura hated it when Danny tried to protect her, but this time Danny wasn’t being overprotective – she was just trying to make sure Laura didn’t get hurt. And Laura appreciated that a lot.

“I promise,” she said, wrapping her arms around Danny and hugging her for as much as that was possible when you’re in two different front seats of a car.

When Danny pulled away, she was smiling and it made Laura smile too.

“Thank you,” Laura said, knowing Danny would figure out herself that she meant it as a thank you for the ride and a thank you for the advice. She opened the door of the car and stepped out, watching as Danny drove away.

 

 

 

 

Laura opened the door to Carmilla’s apartment with a key she’d borrowed a few weeks ago and never returned (Laura would worry if she hadn’t been pretty sure Carmilla’d had a new copy made). The lights were off in the apartment and Laura briefly wondered if Carmilla was already asleep. It _was_ 12 am already, but then again Carmilla never really slept at midnight.

She dropped her keyset and the batch of leftover brownies Perry had given her for Carmilla on the kitchen table and spotted an empty bottle of cheap liquor lying at the other end. She frowned, shuffling over to pick up the bottle and almost dropped it when she heard a voice from the other end of the room.

“It’s pretty good stuff. I’d have left you some of it if I’d actually noticed how quick I was drinking it.”

Laura turned around, the corners of her lips tugging up at the sound of Carmilla’s voice. She’d really missed Carmilla tonight – which was really ridiculous but Laura guessed that’s what happens with best friends – and all she really wanted now was to curl up in Carmilla’s arms and fall asleep.

Carmilla was sitting by the window that had a view over the parking lot, one leg slung over the window sill, dangling out of the building. She had a glass of alcohol in her hand, half filled.

Something seemed to be wrong. There was a heavy air around Carmilla. It made Laura feel a little uneasy. Carmilla took a glance at her, but her eyes seemed harder than usual. Before Laura could ask what was wrong, Carmilla turned around and looked out of the window again.

“I don’t drink. So that’s cool,” Laura said, trying to lighten the mood.

“So, I didn’t know you had a date with Clifford,” Carmilla said, voice colored with bitterness.

It took Laura a second to realize that Carmilla meant Danny by Clifford and as soon as she did, her heart skipped a beat.

Had Carmilla been watching them? It was dark outside but the street lanterns made it completely possible for Carmilla to have seen what was going in Danny’s car. What if Carmilla had heard what they were talking about? She blushed. Had they left the windows of the car open? She couldn’t remember.

“I didn’t,” Laura said in a soft voice. She walked over to Carmilla and came to sit beside her on the window sill.

Carmilla didn’t look at her.

“Sure looked like it,” she said, turning around to finally meet Laura’s eyes. Carmilla’s eyes looked cold as ice as she said, “For a moment there I swore you two were going to kiss.”

“What? That’s ridiculous!” Laura exclaimed, not sure why it felt like she had to defend herself. Not sure why it felt like she’d been cheating on Carmilla.

Carmilla raised an eyebrow.

“Is it?”

“Yes! You know Danny and I – we were never – I mean, maybe in the past, but – I wasn’t – we weren’t – wait! Are you _jealous_?”

Carmilla snickered, the kind of sarcastic snicker that could make her sound so incredibly mean. She leaned a bit closer to Laura so Laura could smell the alcohol in her breath and take a quick glance at her lips.

“You think I care who you kiss? That’s _cute_.”

Carmilla laughed and leaned back to rest her head against the window sill again.

Laura’s stomach churned and she didn’t know why, but maybe some part of her had wanted Carmilla to be jealous. Or maybe not jealous – because why would she want that? – but she’d just hoped Carmilla would show some emotion. She hated it when Carmilla acted apathetic towards her.

She looked at her hands. What could she ever say to that?

“Don’t do that,” she said, her voice smaller than she wanted it to be.

“Don’t do _what_?”

“Don’t act like you don’t care about me. That’s just the alcohol talking,” Laura said, trying to convince herself as much as she was trying to convince Carmilla.

“And why would you think so, creampuff?” Carmilla asked, her voice layered with boredom. Laura recognized the apathy in her voice and it made her sigh.

She got up from the windowsill and took a few steps away from Carmilla, still facing her. She couldn’t bear to be so close to Carmilla when Carmilla said things that broke her heart.

“Because you – because otherwise you wouldn’t be doing all this,” Laura said and she knew that she didn’t have to explain that she meant the whole fake relationship for Carmilla to get it.

Carmilla chuckled sarcastically, “You think I’m doing this for you?”

“Well, I mean, I know you’re not just doing it for me, but –”

“Cupcake oh cupcake, I thought you knew by now I just like winding people up,” Carmilla said. She looked Laura dead in the eye. Laura saw no trace of a lie of some sorts.

She gulped and looked away, trying not to let Carmilla see the tears that were building up in her eyes.

Walking over to the kitchen quickly, she grabbed her keys and the batch of brownies – at least she’d have something to eat to forget about what had just happened – before making her way to the door.

There were a million mean thoughts running through her head that she could use to hurt Carmilla back, but really, she felt much more hurt than anger. So she didn’t say anything. She opened the door and didn’t look back at Carmilla when she closed it behind her. She walked out of the hall with a lump in her throat and let the tears flow as she made her way down the stairs.

 

 

 

 

 

She drew in a big breath of fresh air as soon as she’d walked through the main entrance of the apartment complex and told herself, _It’s okay. It’s not the end of the world. You’re still breathing. You don’t need her to breathe._

It didn’t help. She still felt the sadness piercing through her insides as if they were made of paper.

She walked over to her car and took a quick glance at the apartment building. Carmilla’s legs were no longer dangling out of the window. The window was shut now and Laura was glad: if she’d see the cold look in Carmilla’s eyes again, she’d probably start sobbing.

She turned around and opened her car doors with trembling hands, putting the batch of brownies in the passenger’s seat. She heard something that sounded like the apartment doors shutting and when she turned around to check what it was, Carmilla was standing a few feet away.

“I’m sorry.”

Carmilla’s voice had lost its apathetic tone, now seeming more sincere than ever, and her eyes matched her voice. The streetlights were lighting up her face as if she was an angel and Laura could make up the water in her eyes. Carmilla swallowed hard and the water disappeared.

She took a step towards Laura.

“I don’t know why I said that. It’s not true. None of it is. I’m sorry.”

Carmilla shuffled over to Laura until she was only a meter away. Laura stood as if paralyzed. She had no idea what to do and she couldn’t move.

“Laura? I’m sorry, okay?”

“Are you?” Laura said, finally finding her voice. She sounded about as harsh as Carmilla did a few minutes before.

“I am. You know it’s not true.”

“I don’t know, you sounded pretty convincing back there,” Laura said, leaning back against her car and trying to keep her voice steady. She wished she could just swallow away the tears as easily as Carmilla could. But she didn’t have that skill, so she would have to settle for awkwardly wiping away the water in her eyes instead.

“Laura, please. You know that it’s not true. You were right when you tried to convince me.”

Laura crossed her arms over her chest, “Then why did you tell me otherwise?”

“Because I was hurting and I wanted you to be too. I’m stupid. And I fucked up. But I do care,” Carmilla said, stepping into Laura’s personal space. She was only inches away, but Laura didn’t look at her. She couldn’t.

“Laura please, let me –” Carmilla said, but she didn’t finish, because midsentence, Laura looked at her. For some reason, this seemed to shut Carmilla up as tears appeared in her eyes again. Laura felt Carmilla’s hands coming up to her face, cupping her cheeks softly.

Carmilla kissed her and it was nothing like it normally was. Usually, Carmilla would be dominant and everything in her kiss would tell Laura that she knew how great a kisser she was. Now, it felt as if Carmilla was desperate. Her lips were trembling against Laura’s and it all felt sloppy. It felt as if she wasn’t really focused on the kiss, but more on keeping Laura close to her.

Laura pulled back and breathed in the air around her. Carmilla still smelled of alcohol.

“Laura?” Carmilla asked, hope in her voice. Laura pulled Carmilla into her arms and relaxed onto her shoulder.

She still felt a little broken. As if there was something between them that Carmilla had broken, something she could only fix with a really good apology. She wasn’t sure if this apology was enough, but she’d much rather sleep in Carmilla’s arms tonight than in her own bed at home.

So she did. She locked her car, took Carmilla’s hand and lead her up the stairs. She opened Carmilla’s apartment door, took off her jeans and crawled into Carmilla’s bed in only her underwear and a t-shirt. Carmilla did the same and in any other situation, Laura might freak out, but now she was too tired to notice how good Carmilla looked.

Carmilla’s words echoed in Laura’s mind and she curled into Carmilla to avoid them, her knees pulled up to her own chest and her head resting on Carmilla’s. Carmilla kissed the top of her head softly. It wasn’t enough to forget what Carmilla had said, but it was enough to avoid it.

 

(It was only enough when she was drifting off to sleep and she heard Carmilla whisper, “Of course I’m doing it for you.”)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you guys liked that chapter as I'm not completely sure about it. Anyway, if you did like it, let me know.
> 
> Also: two chapters left! :)


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> holy shit it's almost been a month since my last update. i'm really sorry, guys. i've been super busy with exams and also have had quite a shitty month so forgive me & enjoy!

Although Laura had forgiven her long ago, Carmilla still felt guilty for the incident (or that’s how Laura called it in her head, they never actually spoke about the way Carmilla had suddenly gotten pissed at Laura and then changed her mind 0.2 seconds later). Laura didn’t hold any grudges, but Carmilla was still making up for it.

“I snuck you in some extra cookies,” Carmilla said as she sat down next to Laura at their cafeteria table. She placed a tray in front of Laura that consisted mostly of chocolate chip cookies and Laura wondered what Carmilla had done to gain Laura more than the usual two cookies.

“Thanks,” she said, kissing Carmilla’s cheek. Carmilla smiled and threw an arm around her shoulders, giving Laura the ability to shuffle a bit closer and lean into her embrace.

Laura ignored the look Danny shot her. She’d been trying not to think about the conversation they’d had in Danny’s car. The friendship she had with Carmilla was good and she didn’t want to ruin it by thinking about feelings she didn’t even have – like, really, how could Danny even think she did? That was _ridiculous_ – so she kind of avoided talking to Danny altogether.

She felt guilty because really, Danny was just looking out for her, but she knew that Danny’s worries would pass so she’d just take her space for a while. Danny would understand.

 

(When Carmilla took her to the cinema that night and paid for both their tickets, kissed her during the movie and let her sleep in Carmilla’s bed again, it became harder not to think about what Danny had said.

“Stop worrying, cutie,” Carmilla said when she felt Laura tossing and turning. She wrapped her arms around Laura’s waist and pulled her in.

Laura fell asleep, comforted by Carmilla’s embrace.)

 

 

 

 

They hadn’t made out for a while, Carmilla being extra gentle with Laura since the incident, but Laura knew that it was only a matter of time before things would get heated again.

Okay, so she had to admit that making out wasn’t exactly what all best friends did, but really, who could blame her? With how toned Carmilla’s arms were and the tightness of her leather jeans and the fact that Laura was really, really gay, it was perfectly normal that Laura was attracted to her best friend.

And to be completely honest, it had been quite a while since Laura’d had sex. She had never really been one for sleeping with random girls she met at clubs, way too conscious of her body to feel comfortable having sex with someone she didn’t know, didn’t trust. And her last relationship had been quite some time ago, so she missed it. She did have needs, you know.

So yeah, sue her if she had thoughts about Carmilla sometimes that weren’t exactly thoughts one has about friends. She did feel a little guilty sometimes, wondering what Carmilla would think if she knew what Laura was thinking about. Then again, Carmilla would probably just shoot her a smirk and say something stupid.

She was thinking about it in bed one day, Carmilla next to her. They were watching Star Wars, episode I, and Carmilla had been commenting on Jar Jar all movie long.

“Jesus Christ, what a spaz,” she said, annoyance lacing her voice as Jar Jar screwed up once again.

“Hey, he’s trying his best!” Laura replied, snapping out of her thoughts to defend the clumsy character. Carmilla rolled her eyes.

“How very Laura Hollis of you to be defending the most hated Star Wars character,” she said, irony slipping through in her voice.

“What are you trying to say?” Laura said, turning to look at Carmilla. Carmilla looked up with an innocent look on her face.

“Nothing…”

Laura squinted her eyes, looking at Carmilla with suspicion. Carmilla avoided her gaze and Laura knew what she had to do. She leaned in close to Carmilla, so that her mouth was by Carmilla’s ear.

“I think it’s time for…” she whispered as seductively as she could, “tickling!”

Her hands moved to Carmilla’s sides as Carmilla squirmed and tried to grab her hands, but failed. She tickled Carmilla’s sides and her feet, which lead to Carmilla trying to kick her hands away. Laughing at the sight of Carmilla’s squirming beneath her, Laura climbed on top of Carmilla and continued tickling.

“No, Laura, please!” Carmilla said, but the rest of her pleas were swallowed by giggles.

“Please, Laura,” Carmilla begged, out of breath as she finally got ahold of Laura’s hands. She grabbed Laura by the wrists and took a pause to catch her breath. Laura scanned Carmilla’s face. Her lips were parted, sucking in air, and her hair was a mess. And _still_ , Laura couldn’t help it, but _still_ she thought that Carmilla was so undeniably beautiful. It was frustrating, really.

“Why am _I_ always the one getting tickled?” Carmilla said with a pout.

“Because it’s so much fun to hear you beg,” Laura said before she realized how that would come out. She dropped Carmilla’s hands as soon as she heard herself say it and blushed.

Carmilla smirked.

“There are much better ways to get me to do that,” she said in a flirtatious tone and in any other scenario, Laura would have rolled her eyes at it and changed the subject. Normally, Laura would be able to control what she was feeling. But now she was on top of Carmilla, one leg slung over the body beneath her and she became way too aware of how perfect said body was and how very in reach.

She leaned in and grabbed Carmilla’s face, pulling Carmilla into her. Their teeth clashed but that didn’t matter because Carmilla was sucking at her bottom lip and _holy shit_. Carmilla was licking at her teeth and she had _not_ expected that to feel like this.

She leaned back for some air and noticed the way Carmilla’s eyes had darkened. Carmilla watched her, flicking her eyes over Laura’s face before she leaned in again, this time kissing Laura slower. Laura sped up until they were kissing as messily as before and Carmilla was pressing kisses to her neck and oh _God._ This was exactly what she’d been dreaming of.

She let her head fall back as she felt Carmilla’s soft lips against the skin of her neck. Carmilla was kissing, sucking, biting and Laura couldn’t help the moan that escaped her mouth. She smiled as she felt Carmilla’s sucking intensify at the sound. Carmilla started kissing her shoulders until she reached the line where Laura’s shirt began covering her skin. She looked down and saw Carmilla looking at it with doubt in her eyes, probably wondering if she should go further or stop here.

Laura was pretty sure the line between shirt and skin was also the line between making out and foreplay. Crossing this meant there was no turning back, she knew that. And having sex with her best friend wasn’t really how she’d imagined her next time. The voice that had told her before that this was probably a mistake, now told her that this was most definitely a mistake. Then again, she was only seventeen. Wasn’t this the time to make mistakes? And who better to make them with than Carmilla?

“Take it off,” she murmured.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea with that door open,” Carmilla said, taking a glance towards the open door.

And well, that was _not_ the kind of reaction Laura had expected. She didn’t let it kill her mood, though. Instead, she walked over to the door and shut it.

“Better?” she asked, crawling on top of Carmilla again. But Carmilla’s eyes lacked the darkness that they’d had a minute before.

“What’s wrong?” Laura asked, going over whatever could’ve happened in the time she left the bed to  close the door.

“They’re definitely going to know what we’re doing now,” Carmilla said, a hint of annoyance in her voice.

“Isn’t that the point?” Laura said, giving Carmilla her cheekiest grin. She thought Carmilla would like it, would laugh at her and kiss her and she’d be able to feel Carmilla’s laughter in her throat. Carmilla didn’t like it, though. She turned them around and before Laura knew what was going on, Carmilla had crawled out of the bed.

“What are you –” Laura started, but she fell silent as she saw that Carmilla was packing her stuff.

“I don’t want it like that.”

“Like what?” Laura asked, genuinely confused. She wished Carmilla would stop picking up things that she’d left scattered around the room. As big a slop Carmilla was, Laura kinda liked the way Carmilla’s stuff was spread all over her room.

Carmilla stopped in her tracks to look at Laura as she said, “Like having sex with you just because your daddy’s downstairs and might hear.”

“Carm…” Laura said, but she didn’t really have anything to say. Carmilla knew, slinging her backpack over her shoulder as she made her way out of the bedroom.

 

 

Laura drove over to Carmilla’s house later that night. Her hands were shaking as she took the keys out of her car, stepped out and closed her car door. She walked up the stairs to Carmilla’s apartment, but she hesitated when she held the key to Carmilla’s door. Would Carmilla even want to see her right now? Maybe she’d come too soon. Maybe she shouldn’t have come. Maybe Carmilla needed time to process her anger and she’d be invading Carmilla’s space and time if she just barged into Carmilla’s room.

She pocketed her keys and instead used her trembling hands to knock on the door.

Carmilla appeared not more than half a minute later, sliding open the door just a crack and opening it fully when she saw it was Laura standing on the other side.

“Hey,” Laura said, voice nervous as she asked, “Can I come in?”

The scowl on Carmilla’s face didn’t disappear, but she did step aside to let Laura in. Laura stepped forward quickly, afraid that Carmilla would shut the door if she didn’t step in soon enough.

She wasn’t sure whether to take off her coat and sit down. She had never felt this uncomfortable in Carmilla’s apartment.

Carmilla, to make it even harder, sat down on the couch and watched as Laura fumbled with her hands. She didn’t invite Laura to sit down or asked her if she wanted a drink, just crossed her arms and looked at Laura with the scowl still on her face.

“I’m sorry,” Laura started, feeling awkward but wanting to break the silence, “for pushing too far. I shouldn’t have done what I did today. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or anything, I just got lost in the moment. I mean, you are a pretty great kisser and – I mean not that that makes anything okay, like, you being a great kisser doesn’t give me permission for anything and I should’ve checked with you and–”

“Stop talking,” Carmilla said, not unkindly, “and get over here.”

Laura blushed, realizing how much she had been rambling, and took a step towards the couch. When she stood in front of Carmilla but didn’t sit down, Carmilla rolled her eyes and took her hand to tug at it gently until she was sitting down next to her.

“It’s okay. I just – if anything like that happens between us,” Carmilla sighed, ran a hand through her hair, “I don’t want it to happen because of your dad.”

Hearing those words, Laura was pretty sure her heart stopped beating for a few seconds. Or started racing. She wasn’t sure. She didn’t have biology so sue her. Point is, her breath got stuck in her throat and she didn’t know what to say for a while.

“Me neither,” she said eventually, in a soft voice. Carmilla smiled and opened her arms for Laura to crawl into. Laura did so quickly, having worried about whether she would still be able to do this the past few hours.  

“So I’m a good kisser, huh?” Carmilla said and Laura could practically hear the smirk in her voice.

 

 

 

 

Things started looking up from then on. Laura didn’t notice right away, but after a few weeks she realized that the past few weeks had been… well… easy, almost.

She had found a perfect balance between hanging out with Carmilla and hanging out with her friends, even mixing them up sometimes. Even though Carmilla would never admit it, Laura knew she was actually starting to like LaFontaine and was learning to tolerate Perry and Danny more as well.

On top of that, she’d actually been arguing with her dad less. In fact, her dad seemed to be choosing her side in arguments more often. It was a weird feeling to actually have an ally in her home again and some days she still cried because this feeling should not feel so unfamiliar, but most days it made life just a little easier.

Maybe it was just because he’d been arguing with Natalie more and he wanted someone to back him up. Anyway, Laura would take every small perk she could get without getting used to her dad’s behavior. If she didn’t get used to his treating her as an actual child of his, then she couldn’t lose him again either.

But she had to admit he made it pretty hard when he made her favorite meal on days she felt stressed out or when he told Laura he approved of Carmilla if she made his daughter happy or when he asked Alex to do the dishes because Laura was busy with school.

And she couldn’t deny that when he broke up with Natalie after an especially long fight and both Natalie and Alex moved out, it was nice to be with the two of them again.

There was just one problem now. One thing to feel bad about.

And that was Carmilla.

 

 

 

 

“Hey, you wanna hang out at yours today? See if we can piss off your dad and his girlfriend by talking about getting matching piercings?” Carmilla asked with a smirk on her face as she stabbed at her salad with a fork, driving it far away from the things she actually enjoyed on the plate. There was no way Carmilla was going to eat vegetables voluntarily. Perry eyed her suspiciously: she’d given Carmilla and Laura a thousand speeches on eating healthy things. In vain.

“Uh, tonight’s actually not really a good night. Maybe some other time,” Laura said, smiling sweetly at Carmilla.

Okay, so _maybe_ she hadn’t exactly told Carmilla what was going on. Maybe she hadn’t told her that her dad was actually treating her right again or that Alex and Natalie had moved out. Maybe she hadn’t really told Carmilla anything lately.

She knew that Carmilla was starting to suspect something was up. And it was so incredibly wrong of her that she would just laugh Carmilla’s suspicions away, would kiss her if she asked about it, but she didn’t know what else to do. At some point she had decided not to tell Carmilla and now there was no way back.

Honestly, she knew why she hadn’t told Carmilla. It had been clawing at her and eating her up from the inside the moment she started lying. But she didn’t want to think about that. So she wouldn’t.

Carmilla sighed beside her, probably thinking about the same thing Laura was thinking about. Laura didn’t say anything and settled for tangling her fingers with Carmilla’s and resting her head on Carmilla’s shoulder instead.

(It felt all wrong nowadays. But she tried not to think about that, either.)

 

 

 

 

“Laura?” Carmilla asked her one night. They were in Carmilla’s bed, watching a movie that Laura had stopped following as soon as Carmilla had turned it on.

“Hm?” Laura asked, not turning around to look at Carmilla even though she heard the worried tone of her voice. She told herself it was just because it felt so good to have Carmilla’s arms around her waist. It had nothing to do with the difficulty of looking into Carmilla’s eyes and lying to her.

“What’s wrong?”

Laura shuffled out of Carmilla’s embrace to roll around and face her. That was the first time Laura actually considered telling Carmilla. There was fear in Carmilla’s eyes as she took in Laura’s face. She looked so genuinely worried and all Laura wanted to do was tell her that nothing was wrong, that things were actually looking up. Laura wanted to tell her what had been going on lately, because if there was anyone of her friends who deserved to know, it was Carmilla. Carmilla who knew she was hiding something, who looked at her as if she was afraid Laura was in danger.

All she wanted was to reassure Carmilla. But that meant that this would be over. If there wasn’t a dad to piss off, that meant there was no actual reason for Carmilla to be around her anymore. Laura didn’t have an excuse to be kissing Carmilla, to spend half her time with Carmilla or to simply hold her hand. And as much as she hated to admit it – had hated to admit it for a while now – she didn’t want that to go away. She didn’t want Carmilla to leave.

She’d gotten used to Carmilla, to Carmilla rubbing her back when she was upset, to Carmilla pressing a quick kiss to her cheek when they saw each other for the first time on a school day, to Carmilla holding her at night. She had gotten used to Carmilla and she had fallen for her.

It was stupid and she hadn’t told anyone yet. If she told Perry and LaFontaine she would be greeted by a frown and a told-you-so-smirk. She knew that if she told Danny, she’d try to be cool about it, but with their past whatever-the-hell-that-was it was just too weird. And as sweet as Kirsch was, she’d found out that talking about feelings with him… Not the best plan.

So she’d kept it to herself and it terrified her. She’d been in relationships before, of course, and she had had unrequited crushes before, just never on her best friend. Hell, she hadn’t even really had a best friend in the past.

She just didn’t want to lose Carmilla, really. It was selfish and she hated herself for it, but she had decided not to tell Carmilla yet. Carmilla had been the only thing keeping her sane the past few months and she wanted to enjoy that sanity for a little longer.

So she just smiled at Carmilla and said, “Nothing’s wrong.”

Carmilla frowned, “Are you sure?”

She nodded and leant in to kiss Carmilla, cupping her face as she pressed their face together as close as possible.

(If Carmilla noticed the trembling of her lip, she didn’t say anything.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you liked it! every single time i post a chapter i'm like "hm i hope they'll like this one, this one was kinda weird, i hope they didn't think it was too weird". that feeling never really goes away for me. but then most of the time you guys leave comments and it makes me feel so much better and super happy in general. that wasn't like a hint, i'm just genuinely thankful for your support :)


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all don't know how much work it is to upload a chapter from your phone, especially when your phone fucks up the entire lay-out. Also, I'm in Italy atm so using internet is costing me like a million euros rn. But I didn't wanna make you guys wait any longer, so yeah. I hope you like it :)

Laura shuffled down the stairs and opened the door to the living room. She greeted her dad and anxiously took a seat next to him on the couch. When he'd called her downstairs a while ago, saying that they needed to talk, she hadn't had any idea what to expect.

Was this gonna be the end of them actually getting along? Was he gonna tell her that Natalie would move back in? What the hell did this mean?

She had put off coming downstairs, saying she needed to add the finishing touches to a non-existent paper, but after a while she knew she had to go.

When she'd settled on the couch her dad sat up, straightening his back and folding his hands in his lap.

"Laura,” he said, “there is something I have to tell you.”

Laura nodded, waiting nervously. If only he'd stop being a drama queen and just spit it out.

"Do you remember I got mad at you for not taking out the trash, a while ago?"

Laura nodded. She remembered that night all too well.

Sometimes she could still hear what he had said about Laura's mother. Sometimes she lay awake thinking of the anger on his face. It usually helped to remember the way Carmilla had held her that night and the things she'd whispered until Laura had fallen asleep.

"I said some things that night I'm not proud of, in particular about your mother. What you told me that night helped me make me the decision to start seeing a therapist. The sessions I've had have made me realize that I haven't been a good father lately."

Laura bit her lip. She wanted to say something, wanted to reassure her dad that he wasn't a bad father at all, but she couldn't. The truth was that he had indeed neglected his dad duties and she couldn't sit there and tell him he hadn't, when she'd been crying herself to sleep so many nights because of him.

"I'm really sorry, Laura,” her dad said, looking up from his hands. There were tears in his eyes and Laura didn't know what to say.

She was so glad he finally realized what had been going on, but at the same time it seemed like a trap. It seemed too good to be true after all that had happened.

For now, however, she could just enjoy it.

She didn't tell her dad that it was okay, because it wasn't. Instead, she just leaned in and gave him a hug. As she felt him shake in her arms, she let some tears escape herself.

 

 

 

 

  
**Carmilla (7:21):** Hey, you wanna hang out?

Laura checked her phone while she waited for her dad to return with the popcorn. He was obviously trying to make up for the past months by taking her to the movies. Laura knew it would never truly make up for what had happened, but at least she had a fun night out.

 **Laura (7:22)** : as alluring as that sounds, i cant. sorry :(

She pocketed her phone, but grabbed it from her pocket immediately as she felt it buzz again.

  
**Carmilla (7:23):** You sure? I've got something nice planned.

 _Way to make me feel guilty,_ Laura thought. Then again, she probably deserved to feel guilty. Carmilla had an evening planned for them and Laura was lying to her that she couldn't come when in truth, she was with her dad, who she had been lying about to Carmilla as well.

_Great job, Hollis._

 

 **Laura (7:23):** im sure. sorry. maybe tomorrow?

 **Carmilla (7:26):** Okay. What are you so busy with anyway?

 **Laura (7:28):** english paper :(

Carmilla didn't reply after that.

 

Laura tried to hide her disappointment as she took the snacks from her dad, walked into the auditorium and turned her phone off.

(She probably didn't deserve a reply anyway.)

 

 

 

  
Carmilla didn't show up to school the next day. In fact, she didn't show up all week. She responded to texts with short answers, saying she had a flu and needed to just stay at home for a while. When Laura offered to come over and make her some soup, she refused. When Laura offered to come over and keep her company, she refused. When Laura offered to come over and do some grocery-shopping for her, she refused.

It took Laura two days to figure out that Carmilla wasn't really ill. At first the thought Carmilla just didn't feel like being around people. She knew that feeling all too well. However, Carmilla felt that way most of the time and Laura was an exception, most of the time. Carmilla hated everyone but her.

When Carmilla stopped answering her texts, she figured it had something to do with her. She just didn't understand why. What had she done?

The last time Carmilla had acted so distant towards her, it had stopped when Laura called her, crying. Laura had never really found out why Carmilla had been acting so distant. Could she be acting distant this time with the same reason as last time?

Laura figured it was best to give Carmilla some space.

She tried not to bother Carmilla all week. She tried not to text her pictures of JarJar when she was watching Star Wars and she tried not to tag her in cat videos on Facebook. She tried not to think of Carmilla when she was listening to Carmilla's playlists on Spotify and she tried not to let her thoughts wander off to Carmilla when she was hanging out with her other friends.

Laura only knew Carmilla was back at school when LaFontaine told her Carmilla had been in biology class. She hadn't seen Carmilla around and Carmilla hadn't come to sit with them at lunch either. She was terrified when she had her first history class that week and she tried not to be too disappointed when Carmilla didn't show. She could've expected it, after all.

 

 

 

 

  
When Carmilla didn't show up to their third history class of that week, she'd had enough. She had a creative writing class right after history, but instead of going to her classroom, she walked out of the school.

With a quick pace, she walked to the bleachers and found exactly what she'd been looking for. Carmilla was sitting on a seat in the first row, a cigarette in her hands. She didn't look surprised when Laura sat down next to her.

“Hey,” Laura said, a little insecure. Carmilla just nodded, looking at the field in front of them instead of at Laura. She blew circles of smoke and somehow, it annoyed Laura.

“I hate the smell of smoke,” she mumbled. Carmilla laughed bitterly.

“Yeah, you only really like it when I smoke in front of your daddy, don't you?”

Laura frowned, “What's that supposed to mean?”

Carmilla sighed as she threw her cigarette to the ground and stomped on it.

“Nothing. Just forget I said that.”

Laura shook her head and turned her body so that she was facing Carmilla, “No, you're gonna have to tell me what's going on here.”

When Carmilla just kept staring at her shoes and didn't say anything, Laura shook her head again, this time in disbelief.

“I can't fucking believe you, Carm.”

Carmilla looked up at Laura's use of swear words, but that didn't stop Laura from going on a rant.

“You ignore and avoid me for a week, when all I try to do is be nice to you. You don't come to class, which is fucking stupid because we both know you don't learn from textbooks, but from paying attention and you do show up to other classes so I have to hear from my friends that you're back at school while you're supposed to be my best friend and tell me everything —”

“That's rich, coming from you.”

“Excuse me?”

“Oh, you heard me,” Carmilla said, turning around. They were opposite each other now as they both glared at each other.

“Do you have something you wanna say to me, Carmilla?” Laura dared the girl opposite her.

“Yeah. That you can't tell me that I should tell you everything when you've been lying to me for fucking weeks now.”

Laura was taken aback by that comment and she struggled to find a fast reply. She couldn't find anything to say, however, so Carmilla took the lead again.

“Yeah. When were you gonna tell me, Laura?”

“Tell you what?” Laura managed to squeak.

“That you're on good terms with your dad again.”

So Carmilla knew. Laura wondered how long she'd known for. Had she just known for the past two weeks, or had she found out way before that?

Laura looked at her hands. She didn't know what to say. She'd been caught red handed and it was bad. Carmilla was completely right to be angry at her. It had indeed been hypocritical to want Carmilla to tell her everything when she'd been hiding a huge thing from Carmilla for weeks.

“I'm sorry,” she mumbled.

“You fucking better be,” Carmilla said. She mumbled something about needing another cigarette, but didn't light one.

“How did you find out?”

“I saw you and your dad at the cinema. Remember I texted you that night? I was at the cinema to buy us tickets for that dino movie you wanted to see. Which was obviously fucking stupid, because then I saw you with your dad. And I figured it out pretty quickly. Why you'd been so absent all the time, why you didn't wanna hang out at your place anymore. It suddenly all made sense. And I was upset that you didn't tell me, but I figured I'd give you another shot. I asked you what you were doing that night. I thought that maybe, if I gave you a chance to tell me, you would. But you just lied again. You just made up an English paper."

The guilt of all the previous weeks tumbled up onto one giant mess when Laura heard Carmilla's voice. She sounded so sad, so betrayed. As if she couldnt believe she'd actually dared to trust Laura. And maybe she was right. Maybe she should've never trusted Laura.

Maybe she was about to say she didn't want anything to do with Laura anymore, and she would probably be right. The thought made Laura tear up.

“Carm, I'm so sorry.”

“Why should I believe you? You might as well be lying now,” Carmilla said, her voice bitter. Laura looked at her and Carmilla stared straight back. If Laura's tears bothered Carmilla, she didn't let it show.

“I wouldn't just lie to you.”

Carmilla laughed bitterly, “You have literally just been lying to me for weeks.”

She got up and started to walk back towards the school.

Laura followed her, as she had done so many times. 

“Carm, please stop. That wasn't — I did that with a reason.”

Carmilla stopped and turned around. Laura saw some of the anger in Carmillas eyes disappear and make place for curiosity.

Laura sighed. This wasn't exactly the ideal moment to tell Carmilla everything. Then again, she might not get another moment.

She looked into Carmilla's eyes and bit her lip nervously when she said, “I didnt want this to be over.”

Carmilla raised an eyebrow. Laura closed her eyes.

“You are the best thing that has happened to me in the past few years. You can roll your eyes at that, but it's true. I've never been so comfortable with someone. I've never had someone who could calm me down with just a shoulder bump. I've never had someone who would laugh at my dorkiness but also make me feel like they weren't laughing at me.”

She opened her eyes to see Carmilla staring at her with a puzzled expression, the anger having disappeared mostly from her eyes.

“My dad broke up with Natalie a few weeks ago. Before then, he'd already started acting more civil, but when she moved out of the house, it was actually like old times again. As happy as I was, this also meant that I didn't have to make him or Natalie angry anymore. And that meant that you and I wouldn't have to fake a relationship anymore.”

She gulped and told herself, _Just get it over with, Hollis._

“I didn't wanna lose that. I didn't wanna lose you. I mean, I know that I would still have you, as a friend and all, but that wasn't enough anymore and it probably sounds stupid and I don't know —”

“So does this make us actual girlfriends?” Carmilla cut her off.

“Wait — what?” Laura stumbled out. From all the possible responses, this was _not_ the one she'd expected from Carmilla.

“I mean, that's how it works, right?” Carmilla asked, as she walked over with a grin on her face, “I like you, you like me, the past shows we work out pretty well in a relationship.”

“You _like_ me? Like, romantically?” Laura asked, checking just to make sure she hadn't misunderstood.

“Yeah. Why do you think I was so jealous of you and jolly ginger, that night I got angry at you? And why do you think I acted so distant last time? I realized I liked you and was fucking terrified. I didn't know you felt the same.”

Laura let a grin even bigger than Carmilla's take over her face as Carmilla wrapped an arm around her waist.

“So you wanna be my girlfriend?” Laura asked as she slung her arms over Carmilla's shoulders, locking her hands behind Carmilla's head.

Carmilla nodded.

Laura, overtaken by joy, laughed before leaning into Carmilla's mouth. She kissed her girlfriend, soft and slow and filled with the meaning that she hadn't dare to let out before. Carmilla's hands had a steady grip on her waist and she leant into them a little, smiling slightly as she felt Carmilla move along with her. When she was smiling so much she couldn't kiss anymore, Carmilla pulled away.

“So,” she said with a smirk on her face, “When do I get to meet the parents?”

(Laura laughed and kissed her some more.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's a wrap! I hope that ending was what you expected of it. It's kinda hard to let go of this fic because of how much love you guys have given me. Every time I woke up to a new amount of comments, it made my morning and boosted my ego (which, some people may argue, wasn't necessary but I personally really appreciated it ;)). So thank you for that :)
> 
> I will not do a sequel to this fic, but am planning on writing a sequel of my other multi-chapter fic (I found love, a clexa restaurant AU), so if you want, you can follow that one.
> 
> Thank you guys so much!


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